Either that or he is a baby. They poop lying down.

A “peak” or a “peek,” dear Judy?

UGLIEST PANTS EVER.

It's not that mature women aren't supposed to wear Eileen Fisher, it's that we're supposed to Go Away.

...getting a peak into black America!? please tell me you are like...100 years old...

You slept with a guy who was cheating on his girlfriend who had cancer?

I don’t know if the “roughly” translated German is terribly sad or outrageously funny. “Madame, you are a lesser character”, “Whatever you do, you are not allowed to jump on me any more”. I need T-shirts with these quotes on them.

I’ll bet he’s rarely even been in a grocery store!! (JK...I’m sure after his long day constitutionalizing and making well morals, he regularly swings by the grocery store to pick up off-brand boxed cheeze pasta and discount ground beef to make cheezy-mac for his wife and children. It’s a well known factic that…

“When I can’t afford it on my pay, I don’t want people on the taxpayer’s dime to afford those kinds of foods either.”

List of approved items;

I am an unashamed Dance Moms lover. I think Abby Lee Miller is awful (did anyone see the last episode where she told a girl to get her ears pinned?! what a monster!!!) but the girls are so damn talented. I just love watching them dance. As soon as my daughter was old enough to pay attention to TV (less than two) she…

I cannot lie I love Eileen Fisher.

I should also take this opportunity to say, to the assholes who are so fond of telling women, "We're not mind-readers! If you don't like something a guy is doing, it's up to you to tell him!": Dudes, if it's obvious to an entire group of blind-drunk women that a stranger is uncomfortable, then it should be obvious…

If only there had been a good guy with a chair, this could have been prevented.

"I don't understand why women just don't TELL men they aren't interested."

“She could stay off the deep dish pizza for a little bit.”

One thing you guys can also try is using a bath towel to make a cat burrito. I've had bottle babies that hated getting their nails trimmed once they were adults; sometimes, with some cats, they hate it no matter what you've tried to do.

You know what? I’d wear the entire outfit. And the shoes.

"cats like to act like drag-queens"

That's what the gin is for.