“You know when it comes down to it, I realized I really like money...”

I was really hoping the story was about him pinch hitting in the 9th or something.

It’s never fun opening the credit card bill after a big party.

The big news is that Richard Jefferson is only 36 years old.

“I wish I’d thought of that.”

David Cone used to play himself too.

I do too, and I specifically request that the third factor is a text printed out then physically mailed to me.

Under what charge you would like them to be arrested?

Next-of-kin notification can take awhile sometimes, even if the police do everything right. The PD can only notify the legal next-of-kin in most places, and if that person has moved and not updated their information or something simple like that, it can easily take a few hours to track them down. Sometimes there are…

KANYE IS THE GREATEST ARTIST OF ALL TIME.

I’m so weary of Kanye West. I know shock performance artists who are less up their own ass than he is. This is some tired shit.

You got juiced!!

You’re confusing jail with prison. There’s no drugs in jails.

Serious question for Desdspin staff- Do you already have the Manziel obit post written, with just the date, location, and cause left blank?

I bet he has thrown tens of thousands at the problem.

It won’t be.

She doesn’t know what else to do. This is quite literally the ONLY thing she knows front to back.

I don’t mind Amber Rose, but is women liking sex (gasp) really how she wants to market her show? That was revolutionary when Masters and Johnson wrote about it in the 50's. Now it's zzzzzzz territory.

“I believe that socialites should pay for their own ill conceived talk shows.”

That's some A+ brown-nosing right there.