I’m just replying to you because I got sick of scrolling down. Roosevelt #1, George OG Washington is #2 though. That man was 6'2" and tough as nails.

I believe Ichiro could hit 30-40 yr if he wanted but he hates to strikeout so he hits for average. I also believe Gregg Zaun is an enormous piece of shit.

I mean I laugh. I get that internet cynicism is THE BEST, but maybe just chill and enjoy it?

Ah yes reddit, the Holy Grail of intelligent, nuianced criticism.

Am I the only one who constantly mixes up Raiders and Last Crusade when I am recalling scenes? Yes? Ok bummer.

Okay I’ve been going through these comments. Does Pitt have the most tragic greats in pro-football history?

He’s a first ballot hall of famer for sure. He was a James Harrison (questionable, I think Larry caught him) TD and one of the best all-time Super Bowl catches (Holmes) away from a championship. So fucking close. I’m a Pitt alum too and I’m definitely in favor of Larry getting his ring before Marino. I’d also want…

Also surprising that DC is about the same distance as Baltimore

I’ve done it in 4.5 but that’s pretty much peak speed. It’s tough to leave Pittsburgh, get through the tunnels, hills, Breezewood, Harrisburg and the areas where people say they live “just outside of Philly” without hitting any turnpike traffic.

Agreed, my comment should have read “Can’t Deadspin actually use their writers that don’t hate themselves?”

Agreed, she at least enjoys soccer. I don’t think Billy is a moron, I think he just dislikes soccer and enjoys being the hipster/redneck (where are we) contrarian that hates everything. He just seems sad.

I even get that Gold Cup doesn’t mean much, but Billy’s constant pretentious cynicism is fucking worn out. Cool, you like other sports more and think the USMNT and MLS are garbage. You’ve told us this in every article for at least 3 years. Get a new schtick or let someone else write.

promotion relegation is mentioned toward the end, but I don’t blame you for not reading all this drivel

Seriously, can’t Deadspin find one soccer writer who doesn’t write like he’s one whiskey away from ending it all to spite the bartender?

Who pissed in your cornflakes this morning?

With a last name like Garcia, it might not take that much

What in tarnations are you blabbering on about?

The reports that Microsoft Paint has died were incorrect it seems

SA is quietly having a bunk summer. They lost Simmons, LA is garbage and they didn’t move him, the studs are old. He could go there with Kawahi, who plays off the ball, and not have to deal with Lebron’s attitude.

To subscribe to the Bill Simmons theory, it’s about girls or gambling and he wants out.