Most Thanksgiving dishes are very forgiving, if not ideal, at room temperature (think about how good the leftovers still are later that evening). And if the gravy you put on everything is warm, that also helps.

Okay, I gotta ask: am I the only kid who was praying for the showcase to feature a trip to Hawaii, which would necessitate that Diane and Janis wear bikinis?  

Those “douchebag parents” are the type that buy $120 baby Air Jordan shoes that will only fit for about a week before they grow out of them.

Turd Ferguson

Oh shit when Burt Reynolds shows up, and then the payoff is he was never there and Sean Connery extends his hollow branch of friendship.... I need to change my undies. (Front and back have been soiled.)

Kinda like how Alex Trebek reads the answers in a voice that implies he knew it all along?

Also, you never get laid meeting someone at an airport bar.  Unless you’re Larry Craig.

How do you think Trump proposed to each of his wives?

Best Game Show Final Round:

This is centered on capturing that alluring octogenarian vote hand down. Fear captures the old people vote. Good luck Wisconsin your gonna need it.

I love how the far right runs on platforms of, “We’ll take away protection for workers, give money back to the richest, and stop giving assistance to those who need it!”

Vukmir explains in the ad that she received death threats over her policy positions: busting up unions and defunding Planned Parenthood, among others.

Get this nutjob out of my state.

“During the primary campaign, Vukmir ran ads in which she attempted to link Baldwin with the mastermind of the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks, calling them “Team Terrorists”. PolitiFact rated the claims “Pants on Fire” wrong.”

The whole ad looks like something out of The Handmaid’s Tale.

That’s the face of mental illness. A woman sitting at a table, ranting about her insane thoughts, with a gun on the table. Any other country, she’d be arrested and put in special care.

At least she isn’t riding around in a bus, threatening to take undocumented immigrants hostage and forcibly smuggle them into Mexico.

Not seen having dinner with Leah, Mike Pence. He wouldn’t want to be tempted away from mother by something so hot and steamy.

That’s cool. The outgoing representative from my state running for governor had an ad where she declared that to effectively govern South Dakota, all you need is “a gun and a horse.” She won the primary hands down, and in all likelihood will be our next governor.

What if Fidel Castro had made it as a baseball player? What if Hitler’s art career had really taken off? What if Pol Pot’s male modeling career hadn’t faltered?