The fuck are you talking about? StarFox 64 is leaps better than the original StarFox and both X and GX are better than the original F-Zero.

I mean... 1 and 2 are switched on accident right?

If you wanted to see top-notch boxing, you had to pay in order to subscribe to HBO, and then for the biggest fights, pay again for pay-per-view.*

It’s callled “Speedball,” and it’s killed a lot of people, including John Belushi.

I cannot recall the last time it took me more than a couple of minutes to get a printer working on a PC.

Delaney Muldoon only serves to remind me of the far superior SULTAN McDOOM.

Just meet out in centerfield, boys

The Kings just traded their No. 5 and No. 10 picks to the Mavericks.

Olynyk still nailed almost everything he threw up

That’s more than freedom (which carries a hefty fuckin’ fee)!

Have you ever watched a draft lottery involving the Celtics before? Jayson Tatum will be a decent consolation prize - no matter how perfectly scripted Fultz to Boston and Ball to LA would seem.

Waltman, who also wrestled as Syxx, the 1-2-3 Kid and under several other names

WE AH NAWT FACKIN RACIST!! WE CLEAHLY HAVE NO PRAHBLEM WITH MALCOLM BUTLAH OWAH ISAIAER THAWMES. WE DON’T EVEN HOLD IT AGAINST TAWM BRADY FAH LEAVIN THAT NICE IRISH GIRL HE NAWKED UP FAH THA BLACK CHICK HE WOUND UP MARRYIN!!! NAWT MY TASTE BUT TAH EACH HIS OWN

Pictured above: Lavarr’s preferred method of motivation for his AAU team.

I don’t know Lonzo, but this goes for all kids: Don’t let your parents make you think you owe them. If you appreciate what they did and want to thank them, that’s fine, but it’s your life. Live for you, not for them.

“Wanna see me throw this ball clear over them mountains?”

Amaaazing!

It’s time for the New York Post Mike Lupica Headline Game!