[Farts all day in a tune that sounds suspiciously like Debbie Gibson's Electric Youth.]

80%? Really? Why am I never surveyed? Am I left out of surveys because I am a freak of nature?

The people who say 'Hey! SEE, it isn't just America!'

Girl you do not get to count the inches of cock twice. You can count BJ's given to the same person each time but UP and DOWN don't both get to count.

Not Bearnami? An earthquake at the North Pole causes all the polar bears displaced by global warming to be caught up in the front of a tsunami that hits Vancouver, er, I mean "New York." And there's a nuclear meltdown, so the bears are all radioactive, because why not.

Even better? After coming out of the shark, he reaches back in and pulls out the girl who fell into the shark's mouth from a helicopter 10 minutes before. Same shark! THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED.

This is why my generation had to take a lot of drugs during our teen years.

I guess I like these? Something feels a little off to me though, I can't quite put my finger it. I think it's something to do with them being a bit white knight-y. Like, good men are needed to save the poor helpless women from the bad men.

Other possibilities

I know, right? If you're gonna go for shameful, here, go for shameful, lady. Like a whole roll of cookie dough with Nutella for dippin'.

When I was in the Castro earlier, I saw a cute young (female) couple waiting to hear the decision. I said to the guy next to me, "Do you think this is going to put pressure on one of them to pop the question?" I was kidding, but then there's this...

I WANT LOVE LIKE THAT.

Good luck finding one.

No kidding eh! My ex brought his bunny outside for some sun one day and while he sat in the grass with her, a squirrel came by and tried to take some food. The rabbit went full on death-match mode and KILLED THE SQUIRREL in front of my ex. He just sat there, stunned, as this fluffy little thing comes hopping back to…

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Like this...? Pro∀bition

I'm a total over 35 year old fem-bot now. Pass me the marabou trimmed negligee and high heeled slippers. And a cabana boy!

Congratulation, that means Muslim students now can pray in public.

One of my all-time favorite blog posts seems relevant here.

Sluts of NYC.!