OMG! You drive the Zamboni???? Is it as cool and fun to drive as it looks? I have always always wished to do that once!

My friend worked for VH1 UK in the mid 90s. She said that Mariah Carey was the absolute WORST. Whenever Mariah was coming to the studio, they were required to have a team of people outside to scream and jump up and down and “I love you Mariah” as she arrived. They had to run around the office and force all the interns…

Nope.

My mother died 10 days ago. It is painful to even type the words “died”. My whole life, any time anyone said that “so and so passed” or “passed away” or “we lost so and so”, I would always think snarky thoughts. They didn’t pass anywhere, and socks are lost, not people.

My Yahoo is really good - you can see A LOT of info on a single screen, making it very easy to scroll through for interesting articles. I’ve tried a bunch of others, but it remains my favorite.

I see women in maxi dresses on the street and always think they look so easy-breezy and cute and comfy and they I got try one on and look like an upholstered couch. Yeah, they do not look good on everyone.

Engagement Chicken might not get you engaged, but it is an incredibly tasty and easy to make meal. My nieces love it (particularly the bit about shoving lemons up the chicken’s butt)!

Hey! Lambrusco on a hot summer day can be absolutely delicious and utterly refreshing! It’s a lovely wine for a picnic in the park.

Isn’t White Zinfindel pretty much pink Manischewitz?

My sister has an, um, explosive garlic allergy. Even a tiny tiny bit, and she gets grotesquely ill out of pretty much every orifice. She very carefully explains to each waitress that she cannot have ANY garlic at all whatsoever. Half the time, they put in the garlic anyhow and she spends the rest of the meal huddled…

Ha! That bothered the crap out of me! I kept thinking one of the other guys would see it and yell for him to come back and get it and was horrified when the video ended and it was clearly left behind.

Two years ago, I was in the car with my twin 13 year old nieces and their friend. They were talking about how all the girls brought giant sweatshirts in to school (in FLORIDA) because there was a science teacher who would stare at their chests and make comments.

Driving suits are magic. Even dumpy flat-butted portly guys look extra super sexy in them.

OMG! Making cute little elephant noises! OMG! I WANT one!

I want a giraffe the size of a chahuahua

Couple of coats of gold nail polish would likely work just as well, if not better.

I bike to work in the same dress and shoes I’ll be wearing all day (shoes must have an instep strap or I wind up waiting to fish my shoe out from the road after a couple of taxis ride over it). My commute is under 5 miles and I just don’t go super fast so I don’t get sweaty.

The new Hedwig!

... or Hedwig (and the Angry Inch)

Ha! I had a friend who came to the US from Russia not speaking a whole lot of English. Her first job here was at a lunch counter. Whenever she couldn’t understand what the customer asked for, she just gave them tuna. Almost no one ever complained, and she was never quite sure if it was because she was cute, they felt…