This New Yorker says hey fuck you!

What did they expect when they hired a kid named McLovin

Hi, fellow Islanders fan!

I hate to alarm you, but your dog is missing legs.

What about bears? We’re supposed to get bears on Friday.

The question really just came out wrong. What he meant to ask was:

I can’t look at the header picture without seeing that towel behind him as the form of a sprawled out baby on the seats and it’s starting to freak me the fuck out.

The cross hit Sterling in the elbow.

There should be a special state law that says if you make a delivery guy deliver without tipping him in the middle of a storm, he should legally be able to throw you down the stairs. The higher up you live, the more steps he gets to use.

This is all the proof you really need.

So long, Coach Coughlin.

Seems like a fitting end to his time there. The last coach to take the Giants to the Super Bowl also left as a Fassel.

The only thing that stops a bad guy with a meat cleaver is a good guy with a katana.

Football wives gotta do whatever they can to stay in the game man. Someone younger, faster, better able to play the position is coming for their spot, every damn day.

♫ HGH you work so gooooood ♫

Look, polar bears are great. But the greatest of all the bears we’ve seen in 2015?! Sorry Tom, but it’s gotta be the porch bear, especially at the 3:00 mark, when the bear scrambles away, but then ever so deliberately turns towards the camera, and unleashes a nasty shit by the side of the house. This bear wins.

He should not have didgeridone that.

Wow. Dallas has the worst luck with shots taken in November.