I watches hgtv 10 years ago because it was like a magic show: “We wanted a thing, but it cost $400, so instead we got these 3 random items, nailed them together and painted it.” And you know what? It looked good!

honestly please give me 40 lime green medicine cabinets, but i’m weird.

Would you sing “Dear Future Husband” to it?

It sucks because my dad and step mom are obsessed with those channels so every time I visit they insist I watch some episode and I die inside a little.

100% right. I watch house hunters and see the people turning up their noses at houses that are nice and cost $300,000 while I console myself thinking that at least I can be happy living almost anywhere (that I’m warm and safe). The vacation from reality of nice though.

I would sooner fuck a wild bison than buy anything by Meghan Trainor.

That was honestly my breaking point. Why can't Hillary EVER complete a fucking renovation correctly and on budget. The woman would find water damage in the Sahara.

I seem to be the only person who can’t stand any of the drivel on HGTV or Food Network (whatever it’s called now) these days - including this.

I used to work in a health clinic that treated adults but was located within a children’s hospital. I was making an appointment for a 32 y.o. male (regular check up type stuff, pt was in no way dev. delay or had any special needs). I’m booking the appointment with Mom by calling his home number on his profile.

Mom thinks that response isn’t pertinent to the subject matter? Someone else gets a failing grade, too.

i know much more about thundershirts than i do about athleisure

I was going to say, I think we’re being a bit loose with the term friend here.

The Wendy Williams approach to documentation

When the back-up lights went on I spit milk out my nose.

So what you’re saying is that two wrongs *do* make a right?!

Buying a Honda Insight is still the worst decision he’s ever made, a problem somehow solved by the second worst decision he’s ever made.

“That’s not funny!”

Yeah, as a Giants fan and Washington hater, I want them to own this. There’s absolutely no reason not to.