That’s weird. Because I always thought the Beastie Boys were known to let suits

I made myself the Princess Beatrice royal wedding hat and wore it for Halloween. I have never taken so many pictures with strangers in my life.

I went to a charity polo match and wore this hat but in ivory:

I stumbled across a store that sold facinators last year, then spent weeks complaining about how I have nowhere to wear one. Then we got the invitation for my 6yo friend’s birthday: a tea party. Fuck yeah. Went back and bought one, and I rocked it. A few months later, her sister turned one and had a royalty themed…

Alas, due to a Very Silly Rule, fascinators aren’t allowed at Royal Ascot. Only hat hats. Which is deeply nonsensical and more than a little arbitrary. But hey, that just means you get to pick two fantasy head decorations! What’s your second?

But you can’t forget the greatest Ascot look of all time

My high school’s explanation for that was literally: “Exposed shoulders remind people of exposed breasts.” They also banned overalls and all open toed shoes.

School uniforms are a godsend. My kids go to a uniform school, and it’s a lot less stress. My only issue is the “no hoodies” rule. Please, for heaven’s sake, let my kid wear a hooded sweater when it’s cold. Finding sweaters that zip up without hoods is torture!

Since this is only a single antidote, it might be that my alma mater is an outlier, but I think the body policing of girls in schools might have gotten worse over the past few years. I went to hs in the nineties and there was barely a dress code. Marijuana leaf and Coed Naked tee shirts were prohibited and hats…

Heh. Yeah, we’re really just unevolved cavemen and if a woman walks into the meeting room we switch to speaking in grunts and monosyllables. If I see a woman’s shoulder, I forget how to do arithmetic. Hell, if I see a thigh, I can’t remember my own name. Dat skin is sooooo distracting!

I was a 34G by the time I was in 8th grade and the number of times I was called on dress code for basically having big breasts was INSANE.

Almost this exact thing happened to me when I wore a tank top to gym. I pointed out the other girls in the class wearing similar tank tops and was told “it looks different when you run”.

oooooh boy. I mentioned it above, but I was once pulled into the vice principals office when she was walking by and one of my hands was raised to answer a question. About half an inch of side was showing between my pants and shirt. And it was only there because my hand was all the way above my head. On the way to the…

I don’t have a problem with dress codes per se—though I’d rather just see uniforms—it’s the subjective language and sexist enforcement that ticks me off. Who decides if an outfit is “too revealing”? (Large breasted girls can’t win, here.) Why can boys wear tank tops and not girls? Why are only female bodies a…

I suddenly had biggish boobs in 11th grade and all of a sudden the same style of spaghetti straps were no longer acceptable in school. I was approached by two administrators at lunch one day, in front of all of my friends and they gave me a big T-shirt to put on. When I pointed out that I was surrounded by girls…

We had a dress code at my school that was so offensively inconsistently enforced. Pretty popular girls could wear super low cut pants and tiny shirts, but heavier girls were pulled into the office for regular tank tops and shorts. It was so offensive. I wish we were braver then.

Thanks for this. My own horrific Christian school dress-shamings aside, I remember in public school, my friend Penny having this happen to her. Penny’s family was incredibly poor (we impoverished students stuck together- we were easily identifiable by our bologna sandwiches and the omnipresent smell of kerosene) but…

School:
“Clothing that causes a distraction or disruption in the school . . . is deemed inappropriate for student dress.”

Let’s face it. My gender is a fragile disaster waiting to happen. When a pretty lady, or a mostly-pretty lady, or...hell, any lady at all, looks at us, we go to pieces. We’re too emotional, not in control of our desires, and cannot act rationally in the face of the opposite sex. When spurned by any person possessed of…