If you’re in Pittsburgh, the Hofbrauhaus restaurant imports kegs of the stuff from Munich. Sitting outside in the beer garden and throwing back a liter is always a good time.

Calgary could repurpose that stadium as a children’s museum with those horrible primary colors and weird shape.

Silly AV Club, you gotta buy the Teen Moms’ books for that advice.

I dropped my phone making this comment.

Cho: “’Yeah’ -Jeets”

I was commenting on this when I tapped over to Pensburgh because I am a shit human being.

I go to Menards for the racism.

so don’t freak out and smash things—ask me how I know—when the first strategy you try doesn’t work and you have to go back to the hardware store for anchors or mollies or a stud finder or whatever.

About 10 years ago, I went to a big, fancy wedding for my wife’s friend and it was basically just an expensive wedding in a box. It sucked so incredibly hard, but they looked like they were having a blast. The DJ sucked (the DJ always sucks), the food was bad, cash bar, and this was all after an hour Catholic…

I’m happy that I don’t have to hear anything about the Saints anymore. I couldn’t stand it when they were good.

9-5 sleeping is called “dad schedule.”

and that’s when I get one. Everything’s going to go my way!

It’s completely natural to fall in love with the sideline reporter that you’re fostering, but as soon as you decide to adopt they get into the garbage and shit on the rug.

.

Cleveland’s not going anywhere for a few years, so there’s no reason to hurry Garrett’s recovery or his debut, no matter how excited I am to see him play.

Meh, same thing happens regardless of the President. If Obama was in office, someone would make the comment that he’s turning us all into pussies and we should enjoy the footbaw.

Steph Curry: “Sure did.”

Stop being such a wet blanket.

I can’t decide if this article is sadder than Old Yeller.

I-L-L is how I feel when I watch this team.