“We’ve been patient, but our patience is running thin. And your refusal has cost all of us.”

Calm down there buddy, I didn’t say any of that. I said I have never had tennis shoes I can’t just slip on. Nothing about bending over or lacing them up. I literally just slip them on, no bending over or anything. I don’t have to tie them outside of the initial double knot when I put them on the first time, they just…

Acne never goes away in men.  It just moves from the face to pimples on the back.  Kind of like balding is just a process of hair stopping growth on the head and instead growing on your ass.

(cites no place with actual free cheeseburgers)

F-16 is cool, but would be even cooler with AGM-65 missiles that you could use to obliterate left-lane bandits.

First off, Bernie Sanders yells everything. He even yells “HELLO!” at his staff when they come in each morning. So good luck with that, Ryan.

Second, John Delaney clearly lost a bet that requires him to run for president. He’s only marginally more likely to be elected than John Hickenlooper, but even I have a better…

You also need to watch out for fat people hauling ass on mobility scooters.

Not only a late bloomer, but the boy has had some trauma the past few years! He is still recovering, he wants to be with his friends. 

Outing someone based on sexual stereotypes works both ways, and io9 needs to let Will address this on his own time.

Stop trying to spin a defective, premium product into something positive...

I’m guessing Spin Doctors.

Trump looks like the kind of guy who’d fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around.

Look, the highlight of my day is a nice relaxing dump. I’m not ever going to be one of those 30 second poopers that run in all grunting and heavy breathing like they’re delivering triplets. I just want to sit there, relax and just let it happen. Catch up on some reading, maybe review my day. Then come out feeling like…

This comment gave me PTSD

They can delay this device a million years if they want and it still won’t change the fundamental issue with this thing, which is that a display flexible enough to fold is a display soft enough to get scratched up to hell and back in not a very long period of time at all.

What about marathon reading articles about marathons? What kind of damage am I doing to my eyes? Plus you poor saps that had to write them. Who knows the true ramifications of marathon blogging.

Ha, joke’s on them. All they’ll hear on my Amazon echo is bad television shows and farts.

This is a really interesting comment—thank you!

or him...