The older one had an even worse overhang but that doesn’t mean this one shouldn’t be right rather than “not as bad.”

At least remove the frakking landau bars from the back! What the hell happened to attention to detail in Whorrywood?

Really? In pictures and in person I think the back end of the current pony is atrocious. It has neither the muscular presence of the 69-70 fastbacks nor the svelt sexiness of the 66’s. It’s all too long overhangs and weird angles and pointless character lines (the rear quarters of that car just piss me off.) They need…

As a kid I worked in my Dad’s auto/truck/tractor/fix-all-the-stuff-with-motors-in-it shop after school. I was in the process of removing the battery from a side-tray of a John Deere tractor (actual farm tractor, not lawn mower) when I managed to lay the box-end wrench across the +/- terminals and literally weld it…

Technically that would be the most expensive car ever fitted with mud flaps.

“Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Cthulhu r’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn!”

“Papal Wrangler” is the job title I want on my business card.

So all the money and power of the Catholic Church and they can’t swing a better camera than the weekend team at Action News Witness 7 On The Spot?

Does Rubbin’ One Out count?

That’s not rust; that’s “Patina”.

So, if the old Buick Port law of “one vent per cylinder” applies, then that car is running a V79?

Needs an Air Grabber instead!

Just so long as Texans quit trying to foist the abomination known as “Tex Mex” on the rest of the world, they can have the fucking guack.

Wrong! The only correct guacamole is made without any avocados what so ever, because they’ve all been hucked at passing car cause that’s the only thing they’re good for!

Dad, is that you?

This dude must be his alternate universe self in which he discovered Taco Bell at an early age:

So you had to find a way to actually use your degree for a business matter to continue writing off your student loans, right? (It’s cool, I’m an Art Major, too...)

But he wasn’t dozing, he was passed out. The mystery shitter could very well have yelled at him, shaken him and done other “wake up!!” things only to decide that crapping on the coffee table was a better use of his time.

Yeah. Please make sure to keep your Grandmother well away from me. Violence might very well ensue if she attempted to get god on my food.