Nah, that's Greely...

Driven in LA, San Fran, Denver, OKC (heheh), Seattle, DC and up and down the East Coast corridor; quite frankly none of that holds a candle to the consistent, aggressive and inventive stupidity I encounter on a daily basis in San Antonio and throughout the Texas metro areas. Add into it that these morons are not only…

The number 1 thing I've learned over multiple cross-country moves is that U-Haul sucks and their vehicles will fail, often catastrophically, and usually in the most remote, desolate area and at the worst possible time (1am, and in a blizzard, for instance).

Well, some of 'em are more abnormal than others...

"I can't be out of money: I still have checks!"

If you're willing to go do that outside a Baptist church I'll help bankroll the DVD buy.

Rule number 1:

Easy: About the time the dessert plates get cleared away I announce I have to use the bathroom. I then crawl out the window and make my escape.
Man that pisses off my wife every time...

Um...

Your lack of understanding is becoming more clear.

Nobody with a brain should ever feel "SAFE" with 4000lbs of metal suspended above their squishy-yet-crunchy body. Proper jack stands, place at the correct places on a level, hard surface will, however, allow you to work without worrying too much about becoming the filling in a Beemer/Concrete sammich. Logs, not so…

Bingo!

Remind me to never, ever get near you when you're working if you feel that mess is safe to work on. Even if the vehicle is sitting squarely on them they're highly unstable and any lateral force will cause it to shift which will then lead to Gunther getting crushed while attempting to remove the official Bavarian…

Those aren't logs, those are lumber-jack stands!

Anyone bipedal in 5 wears his ass for a hat!

I'm fairly sure the mixer wasn't carrying much of a load. Even with the braking assist provided by the little Pug, I don't think a loaded truck could have stopped that short.

Sad? Oh heck no! That's genius!

That's it! We're donating Detroit and all it's suburbs to Canada.

Familiarity breeds contempt: The airline I hate most is invariably the one I'm flying on at that moment.

Russian? It didn't happen if we don't have dash-cam footage of the incident.