"...a section of land near Bush's home, which resides on top of a cliff in Devon, England, collapsed in a landslide."

Yes of course. Just like Michelle Obama congratulated her just so she could lock up 1 more vote for 2024.

I like to imagine that multiple black women have called him a punk and his oblivious takeaway was that they thought he was Ashton Kutcher.

Linking them to their mother's Facebook page works better, if you get that far down the identity route.

I walked by the cardboard cut out of Phil Robertson at Walmart (I was dragged there when shopping) and punched it in the face, knocking it down. Then I rolled over it with my cart, and no one did a thing! I kept going, people glanced over, shrugged, and went on. For all I know, Phil is still lying on the floor outside…

Lacky: "Welker popped Molly"

In related news, Giants fans mourn the passing of Eli Manning.

This reminds me of one of my favorite Metropolitan Diary entries from the NYT. A guy described walking down the street on a busy day when he skipped lunch; he passed by a woman in front of a store handing out cheese samples so he grabbed one, and kept walking. After he popped it into his mouth and started chewing it…

I never used to like steaks until I started taking off the styrofoam plate and cling wrap. That also makes seasoning them a lot easier.

ha. You got that right. Slick but also a bit sleazy.

Yea he's a regular Jake Gittes over here. Come on.

So if I drink 600 ml up to five times a week, I'll live three times as long, right? I'm fairly certain that's how science works.

I worked at a dinner theatre where we saw all kinds of weirdos. We had comment cards on each table and always followed up on any negative comments. We were serving a cedar planked salmon, and received the feedback "the bread under the salmon was too hard." There was a quick sort through the cedar planks, and sure…

...You are quite literally an abject moron.

It's 2014, no more need for the man to live on the DL.

Concern Troll: [reads about Sams release]

It's unfortunate because Michael Sam is attempting to become the first openly gay player in the NFL, something of enormous symbolic importance, and while no one wants him to be judged by anything but his merits as a football player, many sports fans were and are rooting for him to succeed.

So here's a bit of anecdotal evidence of Russia's idiocy from my recent trip to Belgrade, where I stumbled upon a bunch of Russian tourists and we got chatting. I was walking in the park with my newborn and was approached by a couple who had strayed from their group and also had a little baby with them. Straight away…

Apologies in advance for the length, but I went on a month-long trip with the Worst Woman In The World, and it takes some time to relate. The trip in question an around-the-world backpacking extravaganza with some grad school friends to celebrate our graduation before settling down to real life. Three of the women…

INSANE BAD: I went to college far from home, so it required quite a bit of air travel. Once while trying to get back to college from winter break, my flight was cancelled at one of my layover stops. Shit happens, whatever. But it was in the mid-morning, so not the worst. I hunkered down at my new gate, which was in…