I’d buy your autobiography, anytime

Many thermostats have such schedulers and are not wifi capable. Did you buy your first thermostat last year?

That’s how you cruise, baby. Just lean back and do the most you can with your fingertips...

Getting a Nexus because I’m tired of Apple making life harder just for the dough.

A lot of people like Nickleback, too. Doesn’t mean they’re not idiots.

You never played a FLAC you uploaded to Google Play? Guess not.

People less douchey than your good self.

Loggers in the Pacific Northwest fought against the spotted owl protections, arguing that if they were not allowed to log the last of the old growth forests, their families’ way of life would be lost. Then, three years later, after they had logged all the trees, they lost all their jobs anyway. If they were geniuses,…

Yep, because if one company fails, that means the industry as a whole is beyond redemption. Thank heaven Wall Street never needed bailing out.

This is some grade A trolling. Fill it up with ethyl, and revulcanize my tires.

Yeah, and all it requires in return is that you maintain a 45 year old car! But at least you’ll be safe on those downhill gradients! You’re freaking odd.

Yeah, it’ll be easy to keep your eyes on the road while trying to press some random piece of real estate on a flat piece of glass down to the right of you. Might as well replace the windshield with internet advertising while you’re at it.

To those of you who might be wondering “he’s clearly a well-educated physicist, from a prestigious university, how could be hold such ideas?” I present to you Thomas Midgley, the discoverer and flogger of both tetraethyl-lead (i.e. leaded gasoline) AND freon (the ozone killer). When presented with evidence that…

How’d he get you to the altar?

LBJ was a great man.

“In their own country?” Last time I checked, the vast majority of us are children of immigrants who arrived within the last 130 years. At any time, those already here could have and often did decry that WE were ruining THEIR country.

So General Kelley is forming a human wall with his body? Do we still need to build anything?

“Repeal and Replace Ryan” wins slogan of the year.

Put another way, yeah, America is actually breathtakingly racist, of which the election of Trump is merely the most visible manifestation. Well, now that we can see the fucking tumor, let’s cut the goddamn thing out.

Remember, destroying the planet brings us closer to the Rapture. Christianity: one-upping Nazis since 30AD