Pah, being old doesn’t help. I’m nearly forty, still get ID’ed and let me tell you - it gets annoying. Curse my mother’s family for their freakish genetic trick of not seeming to age and curse my father’s family for not losing their hair/not going grey until their in their sixties. Facial hair doesn’t help either (I…

Dear Carded,

Oooooh, next-day-pho!  Oxtail curry (which somehow always tastes better the next day)!  

PEOPLE.

Then, in all brutal honesty, you’ll only have yourselves to blame. I know that a lot of you’ll have had done everything you could to prevent Shart’s presidency (he’s not a Trump (British fart), but a Shart) but, hey, it wasn’t enough and I know that there’ll be a fair number of you who sat back, smugly voted for…

If you’ve never been exposed to the glacial glare of a pissed off Parisien woman (or worse, the full-blown fury of said-woman losing her absolute shit at you) then count yourself lucky. 

It’s made more delicious when you realise that the economy in the US is still feeling the effects of the Obama administration. There’s a lot of evidence to say that those signs are disappearing (the trade wars with China alone are prone to be disastrous). Too many thick arseholes out there in the Midwest (let’s face…

I’m remarkably chilled about this fucker getting in. The reason is simple: He. Just. Won’t. Last. Brexit alone is a poisoned chalice - either we get out, our economy tanks and the Conservatives are finished that way, or we don’t get out and he gets forced into a General Election (and given how fucked-up the Tories…

It’s from eating the souls of all of those babies...

I’m all for slaughtering those American invaders. They nearly killed Tufty, the fat little fuckers!

My god, but that’s an ugly fucker of a ring.  KILL IT WITH FIRE!

Diddums!

I know some moaning-faced wee hipster with bad hair and breath is going to snark - but I think Korean food is...fun. The flavours are brilliant, a lot of it is so damned colourful and any time I’ve ever had it - either in a restaurant or at a friend’s house - it’s always fresh and it’s always so damned good.

Is that her in that picture?  If so, she looks like a right tit.

Ah, the minions...

*pokes with stick*

This is one of those times when I wish I smoked so I could put my fag out on this shitstain’s eyeball. Fuck him, fuck him to infinity.

Fuck you, Geraldo. Fuck you to infinity and then some.

I’m bloody glad that I have to get up at 5 am to get ready for work because that’s when the Fuzzy Ninja rolls off his bed, struts into my room, pounces and yowls for his breakfast.  World’s best - and cutest - alarm clock.  Mind you, god help us if he doesn’t get his favourite chicken for breakfast...

One of the most delicious pestos out there is pesto alla trapanese, made with tomato, almonds, cheese and basil (oh, and a healthy glug of good olive oil).