"But in reality our first target is going to be partial replacement of the organ."

And come this November, remember to Say No to the Bro

Hellooooooo ladies!

And shark fin soup.

Especially for the canned dolphin.

I also use them for litterbox duty!

That's one habit that I'll probably never break. My boyfriend cracked up when I started storing plastic bags in a plastic bag in the closet... then when I started using them in wastebaskets and to clean up the kitty litter he was amazed he'd never thought of it before.

Just remember, seasons are won and lost on the waiver wire. Always play the waiver wire.

I don't have a backup wife, but I have an extensive list of other women who don't want to have sex with me.

"Around one in four women who have a back-up plan have feelings as strong for him as they do for their other half.

"See this coat? It's ermine. It's rare. It's expensive. It ain't SHIT to me."

Aretha Franklin, the Bad-Ass

He didn't affirmatively consent to having his face shoved into your crotch, so no, it's not cosent.

Ahhh I have really mixed feelings about all of the PA hate going down in this article and the comments. On the one hand: everything you posted is true and it is all terrible. On the other hand: I grew up in Amish country, and I have so much affection in my heart for that conservative shithole. I remember when our town…

Close. This baby cow was named after that one:

Ann Margaret's every outfit in Bye Bye Birdie is on point. For your consideration, I also love Mary Tyler Moore's skinny pants and flats as Laura Petrie in Dick Van Dyke. I swoon with envy as she's serving Rob an after work martini.

My husband and I were just talking about them recently. What ever happened to them???? I know a few tried solo careers but... they were such a gem of a group!

I had to make a burner. Since when are 50 (Keanu) and 49 (Alex) "40-ish"? That's like saying someone who turns 40 next month is 30-something.

So are aliens attacking while this guy comes home from fishing?