That is a stunning number of pages devoted to accomplishing nothing. The only thing it actually does is rename the USOC.

This unwarranted personal attack during my moment of glory is most unbecoming. 

I feel like I have to bring up the Mets simply because my wife doesn’t care that I was right:

You get that off of my internet immediately. 

I don’t know a ton about this, but I’m very frequently adjacent to people who do - There is rarely a photo of a celebrity posted online or in a magazine that they don’t want there. It’s all a sham. Every last bit of it. Everything that happens publicly is there for a reason, and it is all to further their public image…

He should have stuck to playing tuba.

This Kershaw looks like it folds every day, not just in the playoffs. 

This Kershaw looks like it folds every day, not just in the playoffs. 

Is that what "an OJ" is now?

Wonderful. Take $5 out of petty cash. 

Expect the Mets to trade Jason Vargas for a single mid-level outfield prospect who never sees the big leagues.

This is a thing that could happen. 

I’m not really embarrassed to admit that I’ve never actually allowed fried chicken to get to the leftover stage...

The Mets declined comment.

I got a Snofrisk once. But the crack Swedish investigators didn’t find anything.

Any other fast food item is to be binged in a disgusting display shortly after purchase and then thrown away out in the dumpster so your spouse does not see what you’ve done again

This whole thing feels like an attack on my childhood.

I would like to disagree. If I could be +5 after 16 holes on a British Open course, I would be pretty thrilled. It may not be how HE wants to start the Open, but it’s certainly how I would like to start it. 

Indeed, he is generous enough to allow you to argue with him after he ignored the original purpose of the debate and started saying whatever he wants.

That’s an insult to dime stores. Ben Shapiro has one trick: Move the debate into morals rather than government and then spout off about how his opponent is a bad person. He relies on obfuscating the basic assumption that forms the basis of the reframed debate. That's how he seems smart. He makes you argue on his turf.…

I have a 3 year old, so I’m not 12 feet away yet. Maybe 6. I can’t get my hands up. But she thinks hitting me in the face is hysterical, and so she spends a lot of time working on her timing. Which I can’t argue with. So I’m very proud.