Trump’s brain: I have already been investigated for collusion and was totally exonerated. Since I can’t be investigated twice for the same crime I can now collude as much as I want.*

Elway is indeed a stable genius.

Trying to injure someone during a sporting contest is the most American thing there is! Bonus America Points for doing it to your own teammate!

Serious question: Is there any evidence of Trump ever attending a non-holiday Sunday service in his entire life?

REMINDER: Miller has a girlfriend who is proven to be an actual real human woman. Did he hypnotize her? Is she his familiar, guarding his sanctum while he slumbers?

Stumbled on their video for Tailwhip thanks to YouTube’s recommendation algorithm. It was right up my street so I clicked on another. And another. And another. I swear every single song on this record would be any other record’s best song. It’s all singles. I can’t remember the last time I heard an entire album where…

The ultra-right seems to love to take benign or even positive symbols (i.e. OK sign) and hate-twist them into official emblems of the “movement”.

This is what happens when someone who has lived an entirely consequence-free life becomes President. Some one who lies unprompted with every breath only to have people shower him with fame, money and adoration.

Love the crowd cheering for the Pats’ pick-sixes. Here’s to the fans going into full rebellion mode and viciously trolling their own team all year.

Please please please please please tell me ‘Marvcus’ is a typo. Please.

This gguy will have to be recorded on live TV runningg out onto the field and stabbingg the opposing WR to death while screamingg I AM MUDERINGG HIM TO DEATH before the leaggue will permaban him.

The only team that should be allowed to move to London is Houston, the sole condition being that they are required to keep the name Texans.

That’s down glumpteen percent.

Now I get it! He just took the “ah!” out of Mahoney.

Prostrate thyself in abject reverence to the HiveMind.

I’m only partway through Rosetta Stone Douche, but I’ll give it a shot.

Since they are so brazenly spitting in God’s face, I guess that means I can finally marry my houseplant.

Now neither of them will get into Heaven because they made a solemn promise to God that they would endure each other until death. SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE, BITCHES!

On the one hand, I was hoping B3 would adopt a gun upgrade system like Destiny so you could hang on to a gun you like and just keep powering it up to match your level. Not likely though.

Maybe this is the year that a game will finally have a final score of 5-4 and I can die happy.