BIG tangent, but related to horrortears. I was on vacation with my family in Ixtapa, Mexico when I was about 13. My younger sister was 10 or 11. We spent about 12 hours a day boogie-boarding and then would crash, sunburnt on the foldout couch watching Mexican tv and drinking 1,000 delightful Mexican beverages that we…

That kept happening to me too! I told everyone I didn’t mind sharing but was getting sick of buying milk and having one bowl of cereal with it. The worst is whoever was finishing it kept putting the empty carton back so instead of cereal and milk for breakfast I got dry cereal and disappointment.

get the ladybugs out of the room after he was gone all day and left the window open. we moved him to a different room and just waited for morning when the ladybugs left on their own. every surface was covered with ladybugs

I can’t even count how many times I’ve heard that or something similar from the after church crowd. Well, maybe if you assholes didn’t go out to eat on Sunday’s we wouldn’t be fucking working on the sabbath.

You wouldn’t be working on Sunday if they weren’t showing up expecting to get fed.

He’s actually my one celebrity encounter. He was vacationing near where I lived and accidentally cut in front of me in line. I said, “Hey, I’m line here,” (it was a little hard to see as the line curved sharply behind an awkwardly placed display so I wasn’t rude, but I was tired and a bit brusque) and he apologized…

She replied, “Honey, if this is the worse thing to happen to be today, then I’ve got a pretty good life.”

And yet she was cool with going to heathen restaurants to be served by heathens?

My husband had to restrain me at a Disney World counter-service restaurant, where we waited in line to order for FIFTEEN MINUTES, and the people in front of me STILL had to lingeringly peruse the menu board which had been plainly visible to them for FIFTEEN MINUTES (did I mention we’d all been standing in front of it…

Once, an 8-top of Christians left one of those “Here’s a Tip for You!” pamphlets on my table, in lieu of a cash tip. I was sort of used to this, so I didn’t remark much, just tossed it into the bus tub with the rest of the debris, and a glower.

On most days he’s a billionaire rock star but when servers cry out for humane treatment he becomes - ***FRIENDLY CUSTOMER MAN***

Thank you BCO! As a single mom of a rambunctious 2 year old I know that 1) she’s just going to be an asshole in restaurants. period. and 2) the only way she’ll learn not to be an asshole in restaurants is if I take her to eat out and teach her the rules. I order her food first, bring my own sippy cup with milk so she…

I’m a little late but here goes. I worked in a Gay Dennys in Arizona and soon after gay marriage became legal, I had the most adorable elderly couple of men, one white, one black. They were seated at the counter and had on these beautiful leis. I asked if I could feel the real flowers and asked what the occasion was.…

It could have only been better if the customer was Rick Mercer.

Apology-pizza.

Keith Villiardo's story achieves peak Canada.... it takes place at a Tim Horton`s drivethru, involves an eccentric yet harmless customer, and both the server and the customer act amazingly polite all things considered.

I am now imagining Eddie Vedder taking his daughter to have tea and it’s adorable. I’m also imagining them sitting at a toddler sized table and drinking out of tiny flower-patterned teacups.

I once had a customer who ordered a cheeseburger with Swiss but got cheddar. When the mistake was realized, I apologized and offered her a free cookie. She replied, “Honey, if this is the worse thing to happen to be today, then I’ve got a pretty good life.” After getting bitched at by stuck up college kids and…

“Near the end of my lustrous career I had a drive-through customer who asked for his coffee “stirred twice clockwise, three times counter-clockwise, and four times clockwise.””

I’d like to believe that all of these instances were Eddie Vedder in various disguises, gallivanting around the U.S. in a mission to make server life a better life.