"Oh thank God! I thought he was going to quit smoking."

Leyland decided to step down after being offered the prestigious position of World's Greatest Grandpa in coffee mug form

Rosenthal went on to say sources told him Leyland explained to players the usual reasons for retirement, such as a desire to slow down and spend more time with his oncologist."

Meanwhile, Dexter has been charged with child endangerment for exposing these kids to shitty football and MRSA.

I think the real problem with Chivalry is that it should go both ways! In which case I guess it would have to be called something else. Like Basic Human Decency.

Dear Brandon Wade,

I'm pretty sure those were my husband's very same criteria and voila, here I am!

Both of these issues could be remedied by the use of Sheepskins.

Or a violent conflict over control of Northern Ireland.

Kubiak: "Welcome to the team, Vince! I'm sure you'll fit in just fine."

Yep, I know the feeling. A few years ago, I had a week of odd success on OKCupid... I chatted back and forth with a girl a few times, we had a bit in common, it turned out we had inadvertently crossed paths at at a recent film festival, etc. - we sent several multiparagraph emails back and forth, seemed to be finding…

I think the bigger issue here is why Disney is "stuck" between princesses that need to be rescued and limiting the number of female characters period.

Fellow Eagles fan here, living in Giants territory. I'd like to chime in and say: fuck that! I hope they go 0-16.

You are awesome.

no no, see 7 wasn't that impressive, but he forgot to hit the "1" key before. his massive 17 inch dong of solidity nicknamed the woman slayer (as long as she is in shape and not black, not racist just don't like those ashy coons) is something to brag about. It feels oddly like a strap-on you say? perposterous, you…

White men think about our penises more than we do. Sheesh.

Every time some dumbfuck whiteboy says some dumbfuck whiteboy shit every other dumbfuck whiteboy calls it satire like a big dumbfuck.

Alan Thicke told his son Robin Thicke to "adopt a few Ethiopian kids" in order to get very famous. NOPE. But today we learned that apparently the tendency to use other human beings as props is genetic.

we had a lot of calls in the office and people thought that that actually was me in the skit.

Add this to the negotiation and Congress votes to reopen. Ladies and gentlemen...your Washington Orangeskins.