Maybe the DNC should look into selling "Rush Limbaugh-Hardees Special" bumperstickers and buttons. "Fatty, lumpy, greasy sausage meat atop two flat, pockmarked biscuits."

5. Excavate (should be self-explanatory)

I love how 5 and 6 are self-explanatory, but 4 is not. GET HARD.

I really, really wish these so called "believers" would quit mixing up actual doctrine and Paradise Lost.

Apparently JJ Abrams is directing NFL Films now?

Wow, you can tell that Laviolette really cares about the Flyers. Even the gas he pumps is lead-free.

Oh well thank god. I was JUST saying the other day that I didn't have a good period tshirt to go with my period panties.

Also, your balls probably have a much greater chance of scoring.

Yes, every Hispanic person grows up eating tacos. As a Colombian I fucking eat tacos every day. That's what we do, we eat tacos for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Hell my mid day snack is a goddamn burrito sprinkled with some coke, because you know that's how we Hispanics do.

I read Sinead's letter to Miley and, gotta be honest, I had to stop reading it. I don't think it was Sinead's intent to sound concern-troll-y, but it very much came off that way, so I can see why Miley would take offense.

The correct answer is ovaries, as in "That took a lot of ovaries". At least that's what a long ago ex and I decided during a particularly drunk version of this conversation.

Look, if the phrase "you people" is ever about to come out of your mouth, stop, take a deep breath, and walk away.

Greg Schiano: Good fucking riddance. The guy was a complete disaster.

Obligatory post of the adorable Garfunkel and Oats.

Mike's Hard Lemonade has a creepy fixation on much, much younger women.

Ugh, grape culture. Amirite?

Porter shows up to dates on his fixie.

Rep. Stockman was immediately signed by the Eagles, once Chip Kelly heard he was a shutdown defender.

It's not even close. The NFC East at least plays their games.

Just once...JUST ONCE...I'd love to hear a reporter ask a male politician/musician/actor/director/doctor/judge/whatever ask the following questions: