Josh Gordon Says He Got Drunk Before Every Browns Game

Six of your Butt-22 are on the Chicago Bulls.

last-place 1990 Yankees season

It’s just not the same without LeVar Burton. 

Barry, can you reduce your argument to a character or plot development from the 1990 film, Goodfellas? This is the only way I can understand football.

Something tells me that ref is gonna make it after all.

Magary has to be pretty high on the Mohs Scale

I’m conflicted. One one hand, that was the coolest shit I’ve ever seen. On the other, those players kneeling during a foofy pregame ritual was deeply upsetting.

Don’t kink shame them!

He’s one log cabin buildin’/ice fishin’/bear wrasslin’ profile story away from rocketing up the draft boards.

As a certified online deadspin replay official:

So’s their mascot.

Ha, I didn’t notice that. That’s exactly what happened. The penalty spot is the same color and about the same diameter of the ball so in his periphery it looked similar enough to fool him.

Serious answer: That’s where the ball is spotted for a penalty kick.

As Deadspin’s resident expert in manicure matters, I must quibble: That shade of mauve is dull and doesn’t flatter her skin tone. Furthermore, the varnish has flooded her cuticles, probably because they were over-trimmed/pushed back too far. The effect is to make her nail beds look like an infinity pool.

Until I had kids I thought I cleaned a lot. HA HA HA HA HA HA.

My wife I used to see a couple’s counselor, not because we had any specific issues, more like getting your oil changed as preventive maintenance. Once I asked her what was the most common fight couples had. She said, “Oh, washing the dishes definitely.” So I asked how she solved that and she recommended the timer too.…

I’m a single parent, and my “typical” days are pretty fucking packed and insane. On a normal weekday, I wake up at 6 a.m. and have essentially zero free time until I get my kids in bed around 8 p.m. I usually clean at least the kitchen at night before bed, because I hate having to make breakfast and pack lunches in a…

Hmm I could do that or I could leave them in the sink until I think about them again or until the heat death of the universe. Whichever comes first.

Just last night, I had a pounding headache and a weird jerky bit of depression creeping in and just wanted to go to bed at like 8:30 and read until blessed unconsciousness set in. First, though, I decided to pick up the house, and twenty-five or so minutes later the house was clean, my headache was gone, the…