Honestly? I am small and a bit afraid.

Bette Midler needs to shut the hell up

I think Angelina's right, that hat looks stupid. Get a new hat, Brad.

- some points, no tay no 1d

An alarm clock is not a good gift for anyone! I'll wake up when I'm goddamn good and ready!

ooh its never eneding

the only possible scenario of a 13-minute jury deliberation.

Meanwhile, George Zimmerman is out waving his gun around the streets. Darren Wilson will likely walk without any repercussions, too.

I like this. It sort of opens up a whole new field for Christmas Carols. So many of them are all "Santa, bring me presents" or your standard Jesus-Family-Winter mash-up but why not "Santa, fixed rate or variable?" or "Jesus, should I remove the kitchen island for sort of a open concept kitchen/dining room thing" or…

When asked why he was only speaking out now, Scotti says he "felt sorry for the women" who have recently come forward with sexual assault allegations against the comedian. (Sounds like those women probably would have appreciated that outspoken pity in 1990, but, HEY, better late than never.)

Excuse me, don't hate on my beloved casual games, Kim Kardashian: Hollywood requires real strategy

Still fucking bullshit, brah

jfhc, that didn't even work as innuendo, and that's not exactly the highest of bars to clear.

How can phones be real if our eyes aren't real.

He's such a perfect mash-up of his parents :) Jada with a Will 'stache

I say this as a survivor of terrible sexual abuse starting at age 4 and the survivor of 2 rapes in adulthood, it is always an atrocity and no victim should ever be shamed for their behavior or response after being attacked, but being abused as a child is especially bad. I don't know if I'd call it outrage, but when I…

Well, I think I tend to get angrier about horrible things happening to kids than to grown-ups; at least grown-ups with non-traumatic childhoods have had time to form an identity first. Or maybe more heartbroken is the right way to say it?

That's cool- Let me know when they hold a Sofa Cushion Eating Contest or a Safety Razor Eating and Resulting Emergency Vet Visit Contest.

...In attendance were two journalists and a gentleman from The Times...