Costco rotisserie chicken always has some sort of off taste to me.  Not sure if its the brine or what but something always seem amiss.  

Posting it twice doesn’t make it less offensive. 

Diagonal or GTFO. My 6 yr old would starve rather than eat a straight cut sandwich and I can’t say I disagree. People who cut straight are sociopaths.

Every phone I’ve owned if you hit the volume button on the side when it is ringing, it stops the phone from ringing but doesn’t send the call to voicemail, leaving you time to calmly walk outside and not have your phone ringing throughout the dining room. 

Seriously with this question? The sign doesn’t mean you check the phone at the coat check. If your phone rings (or vibrates) get up from the table and take the call outside. Which is exactly what you should do even without a damn sign on the door

Which Audi?  The manual in my 2018 q5 certainly fits and resides in my glove box

The Sausage McMuffin with Egg is inarguably the greatest breakfast sandwich extant (edging out the original McMuffin)... If those two aforementioned are Grade A food experiences, a box of hot and crisp Chicken McNuggets from the drive-through, dipped into (the regrettably discontinued) hot mustard, is an A-…

thanks for the assist

Kinja fail. Tried to add a gif of Milton and his read swingline stapler. Didn’t upload and now it makes no sense.

Stapler?

Well, don’t leave us hangin...

Does someone really believe zebras are immortal unless being eaten by lions?  Is Ben really Trump?

Todd:

Don’t click on link. Don’t click on link... fuck I clicked on the link and might throw up

There goes his chance to star in the Central Oklahoma drama club production of My Left Foot

I always heard the same thing re: Heineken, so when I went to Amsterdam last year, I ordered a Heineken at a bar.  Can confirm that Heineken still tastes like shit in Amsterdam. 

The hot dog is a snack is an interesting wrinkle to throw in there. I would totally grab a hot dog in the middle of the afternoon as a snack but wouldn’t consider getting a proper sandwich as a snack. This may not be all the evidence necessary but adds another checkmark to the column that supports that a hot dog is not…

You mean the football movie he did with Kathy Ireland

yes I tried, yes I tri-i-ied

Today I Learned that there are actually real human beings (At least three of them!!) that care so much about the Foo Fighters that they take offense at them being called lowlifes.