0:20 was the funniest shit.

‘Funcle'

The smile from the woman filming was the perfect accoutrement.

I said “maybe.”

You do make up the greatest stuff.  There’s a dude whose job it is to watch people urinating in order to autoflush the urinals.  That’s just such a messed up mind, which is why you’re one of the beloved Jalopnik writers.

If someone brown did this yelling Akbar they would be arrested and charged as a terrorist. This is domestic terrorism, these Qanon antivax, stop the steal nuts are dangerous terrorists.

Maybe you can put a little ink or use a magic marker to cover the emboss and transfer it to a piece of paper/cardstock. Save the coin tray, your fingers, and you can make multiple!

Mmmm baklava..rather eastern Mediterranean/Turkish. FYI there are several types of baklava, depending on where it’s made. In the Balkans we make it with almonds or walnuts, while pistachios are used where pistachios are grown (so Turkey, Greece, and further east).

Was the proper incantation spoken just before the explosion?

Most lessons are written in blood.

You’ve never been in the military have you?

Now she’s a felon and can’t legally buy a firearm. She can now move to Texas—where permits are no longer required*—and load up!!!

Yeah, ok, but i’m still confused what the baby’s gender is.

If it was me, I would have piston my pants.

Sure, it’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye. Then it’s keep-away.

More ‘Woo’s!’ in that crowd than a Ric Flair convention.

OK, Dr. Facebook.

“I hate crowds almost as much as my wife.”

I share the sentiment, but upon further reflection, there is most definitely a dollar amount that would get me onto a cruise. I don’t know what that dollar amount would be, but if anyone reading this really wants me on a cruise ship, I’m taking offers.

I mean, I have a developmental disability and the R word was thrown around a lot when I was diagnosed as a kid, but I didn’t storm the capital and threaten lawmakers, so perhaps these people are just assholes.