“So, do you have any kids?”

“muh anime tiddies”

Yeah, I just type “203" into my memo pad on my phone.

Sure, we’ll just instruct our toddlers on all the things they’re not supposed to do and trust that they will follow our instructions 100% of the time.  It’s so easy!

Yep, we are capital-F Fucked already no matter what we do.

I’d move to, like, Canada or Denmark in a heartbeat but my wife is all “but our family’s here.”  Fuck that.  They can text, call, or email.  We can visit every once in a while.  I just want out of this wretched fucking sinking ship before an actual literal civil war breaks out.

“...had to count out 238 bars of rest to play 3 notes...”

Dodo birds when?

Yeah, I’m not downplaying the situation and I absolutely agree it’s a pretty scary thing for the woman, but I really don’t see how this is any different than the Pizza Hut, Jimmy John’s, or local Chinese delivery. They have your address, too. They have your name, too. They’ve been to your house and they know where you…

Elysium for the billionaires, Blade Runner for the rest of us.

We agree.  

They do.  Thank you.

Yeah, 100%.  Don’t worry, Captain, your take is absolutely room-temperature.

Imagine giving a shit about the “rich, deep backstory” of Call of fucking Duty.

If I ever got a text from a debt collector, they would immediately receive a response in the form of a high-resolution picture of my latest bowel movement.

I expect people who write words for a living to get those words right.  That’s all. 

You can’t take the time to read, like, four paragraphs before commenting AND you don’t like mayo on burgers? Jesus, what a broken person.

Fucking weebs.

“I never thought I’d have to animate tigers eating faces!” exclaims animator who willingly took a job working on Tigers Eating Faces 4: Face Harder.

Holy fuck, this couldn’t possibly be more my jam. Absolutely preordering this.