“Look, you can either go vegan or go dea-”

Wait, you mean I get to eat meat AND I never have to see Beyonce ever again? Pinch me, I’m dreaming!

Seems sincere so I won’t recommend execution.

I lost interest in it long, long, long ago but I have to admit Ubisoft is supporting and expanding the shit out of this game. I’m impressed.

Right!? That was my first thought. We need a whistleblower to produce evidence of a Trump abortion.

“GameStop aren’t the only German retailer having trouble...”

How pedantic can you get? Who fucking cares, dude? You don’t own the restaurant. It’s literally nothing out of your pocket.

“Skrillez”

FUCK YOU, YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF SHIT!

“We will fight for choice in the industry,” the big babies cried as they fought against choice in the industry.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!  Gaffigan is a conservative!?  Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!  He’s really funny but now I’m required to hate him.

“...having been ‘surprised’ that the Babadook became the queer boogeyman that we night right now two years ago.”

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Ha, nice catch! I think The Shrike adds a little somethin’-somethin’, too.

Bingo.

Bingo.

Not worth it.  Fuck Twitter.  It has objectively made the world a worse place.

Yeah, we were already outbid on two prior houses and the clock was ticking so we just said fuck it. To be completely honest, the HOA itself doesn’t bother me too much because I don’t care about sheds and they maintain a pretty nice community pool. I guess it’s less the actual HOA and more the petty motherfuckers who…

I haven’t used one in over a decade so I’m probably exaggerating, but that’s the memory I have. It kills the sensation so much that it’s almost not even worth it. I’ve turned down sex once or twice because a condom was required and I didn’t think it was worth the effort.

I agree with everything you said except disliking outdoor cats. Why? They are animals. They are hunters. They are most at home outside, huddled in the bushes, staring down an unwary squirrel.  

I don’t disagree but my wife and I didn’t have a lot of options at the time. It’s actually a very nice neighborhood in a very nice area with easy access to highways and shopping, as well as an excellent school district. We didn’t have a lot of money and relied on Obama’s first-time home-buyer’s subsidy (thanks,…