apparently everyone and their mother told him not to say anything. he WANTS to fuck with the election.
Lola
sheraismyhomiegirl
A busload of people and one person acts. (Eventually two.) That’s a scary level of apathy. I know someone is going to say that it was okay for them to not get involved because “you never know” but I’m going to preemptively say fuck that. The aggressor was totally outnumbered and no one had to get physical if they were…
why is this the one that i can’t stop laughing at? is it because i haven’t slept yet or is it “just taking a sweet piss?”
Audible gasp!
Haha, I won this pissing contest last time. My pooping in public story: http://jezebel.com/i-think-i-can-win-this-i-pooped-my-pants-at-disneyland-1634152679
Fuck that guy. I’m glad you made it home safely.
I just remembered this one too.
Ugh. The baby I was nannying had a terrible ear infection, and I had taken on the extra responsibility of taking another kid to day camp, which was in the middle of nowhere.
Last Christmas Eve we stopped at my in law’s to drop some gifts off for extended family, as we wouldn’t be attending the big gathering the next day. in law’s were at another function, so the house was empty. Boyfriend and I had eaten a huge meal with my family and then drove for two hours, so we were in desperate need…
Oh I have a great one. I had to pick my best friend and room mate up from work at midnight because she didn’t have a car and I couldn’t let her borrow mine because I had a kid that needed to be picked up from daycare. (This was YEARS ago, I think my daughter was 3.) Around 7 pm I start feeling really sick to my…
I was so embarrassed about this story that I only just recently started sharing it with people. Back in 2005, when I was 17, my then-boyfriend and I did a 3-week detox diet to cleanse our systems. The minute we’d completed the diet we went to see Brokeback Mountain in theatres. I ordered the largest Pepsi and popcorn…
This may doxx me...
Oh yay! In fourth or fifth grade (can’t remember), I felt sick and thought I was only going to cough when I puked on the back of the kid lined up in front of me as we were waiting to go into the school.
When I was 16 I dropped acid for the first time with a bunch of my girlfriends. We started out in my moms backyard and waited until it came on to head out and basically just wander around town at night. Everyone started feeling it within 30-60 mins, except me, but I figured maybe walking would help it kick so we…
Several years ago, I was drinking with some friends in a dive bar on the Upper East Side. I lived about 10 blocks south of the bar, and so when we left at around 3 a.m., I decided to walk home. Unbeknownst to me, I was the drunkest I’ve ever been without being blacked out (the next day, I discovered that my two…
Vomit story I’m most proud of:
Mine was in 8th grade during a test can’t remember which one TAASK or something. I had a stomach bug told the teacher I was not feeling well but was lectured on the importance of the test. Halfway thru I vomited all over myself the desk and the floor. Then into the trash can on my way out the door. I don’t remember…