Haha your expression is the best! I have some lipstain from Estee Lauder and I think the key for an even look is kind of layering it. But I agree, that color is really too bright.

My mom wanted me to (minimally) hit the tanning bed for my first wedding so I'd have a light tan with no lines, but in general discourages me from getting too dark via any means.

She's awesome!! And adorable!

@elvis_is_everywhere: ME TOO!

@mrs.falbo: Which brings to mind breadfruit- which I have never tried, but doubt it would taste like bread.

And people wonder why I hate my boobs. I can't find a damn thing that fits over them!

@NefariousNewt: And now we can pinpoint the moment in history when "jumping the shark" became a euphamism. Lovely.

I totally treat red as a neutral! (I carry a red bag to work every day unless I'm wearing a pink or coral shirt- haha).

One of the best foodie gifts I've ever received was truffled salt. It makes every roast chicken a thing of beauty!

Also, perfume (with a few exceptions) can go horribly horribly awry as a gift. First of all, if someone has a signature scent, it's probably okay to buy them a bottle *once* since most bottles last at least a year. But just going out a buying a bottle *you* like is such a bad idea. Laying aside all issues of…

I'm glad my fiance didn't read this gift guide. We send all of our packages to my office, and there is a currently a box from Dean and Deluca on my desk that I can't open till Christmas that I'm extremely excited about.

@babyruthless: Yeah seriously. I'd feel completely disenfranchised in the relationship. The message that sends to me is "If anything happens to our relationship, or if I die, my serious wish is for you to be homeless."

@Snarfblat: Much much happier! Thanks!

@shellybean: in all fairness, after that happened, I got up and went straight to a nutritionist.

It's funny 'cause it's true. Well, it's funny until you lose 15 lbs. in a month and have to stop and sit on the sidewalk while walking your dogs. Oh, divorce!

concealer, anti-histamine eye drops (I'm allergic to everything and my eyes get *really* swollen and itchy), Excedrine Migraine, tampons, pens, ponytail holders, phone, wallet, keys.

I've never had a problem with any of my jewelry, including my watch setting off a metal detector.

@shellybean: Oh and how to drive a stick shift and use a toilet plunger.

Things learned from my dad: How to read a tire gauge (and change my tire, but you mentioned that), how to take a splinter out of your finger, how to make scrambled eggs, how to make spaghetti with meat sauce, how to care for a cast iron skillet, how to take a fish off a hook, and how to tell what time it is by the…

Isn't this why Amazon wish lists already exist?