I hope you drink too much, eat too many hot dogs, and give your family hell this week, City Mac.

Oh god the SIDs shit. I was an absolute fucking mess for the longest time after my daughter was born. I could barely stand to drive anywhere with her. If it’s too dangerous for her to sleep in her carseat at home, ISN’T IT TOO DANGEROUS FOR HER TO SLEEP IN IT IN THE CAR?!

Thanks for the #notallfarmers

But interestingly named!

It’s such a practical shape! You can wear it on your hand! I live in a touristy town on Lake Michigan and every time I go into a store downtown I’m like “Honey, we DEFINITELY need another oven mitt!”

“I find that when adult children truly, truly have no regard for their parents or have chosen no contact with them, they have really, really damn good reasons for it.”

Where are you working as a nurse that you make “slightly above minimum wage”?

“Not a fucking motel 8 on the side of your dads dick.”

They make your legs look longer and slimmer. It’s not rocket science.

My body is ready.

I was moping around my house this morning before work and my stupid fucking depression was telling me how much better people would be without me (including my husband and daughter).

YES, the lowest level of depression physically embodies itself. It can make you physically ill. Physically in pain. Physically unable to get out of bed and care for your loved ones, while you lie there and hate yourself for your inability to do it.

My mom made all my doctor appointments until I was in my mid-20s and we didn’t even live in the same state.

News at 10: Privileged Person Doesn’t Think They Are Privileged.

I’m not sure how your 2nd paragraph flows from the first . . .

Every moment of this story is SO ADORABLE.

Holy shit, dude. You started off bad and ended up comically bad.

My husband and I worked for the same (allegedly family friendly) company when I had our daughter a couple years ago. Utter bullshit.

Hey. It’s normal. It’s SO NORMAL and no one talks about it. I’m a mom of an almost-2-year-old and when she was 8 weeks old I was like, “What the fuck did we do?” When they first handed her to me at the hospital I said, “Why is she blonde?” and then “When can I go to sleep?”

Seriously? You’ve never heard of groups of women going to the bathroom for a reason other than to do drugs?