Sources say that he’ll be signed by the Dallas Cowboys even if he goes undrafted.

So does the fact that he merely played high school sports make him sufficiently privileged to make him, his lawyers, and the judge appropriate targets for an online shame campaign? I’m struggling to see how this is a story of national importance. All it will do is stoke the flames of keyboard social justice warriors…

Word has it he has already been accepted at Baylor.

It's a bold move to throw a new cutter into his arsenal this late in the season.

I will never understand non-students/non-alumni actively rooting for a school they have absolutely no connection to. I get that there are no pro teams in some of these states but like, damn

Yeah I wouldn’t mind Draper’s blogs appearing exclusively on Cyber Dust, where no one will ever see them.

I’d criticize school staff for not seeing through the ruse, but in all fairness, nobody’s ever met a 30-year-old from South Sudan.

This is exactly why I don’t get out of bed in the morning. Like, fuck a 50% chance of dying!

Or his taste.

Look at the bright side. If he’s convicted of a third degree felony, the team’s graduation rate will increase by 600%.

See? This is what happens when you divert money from athletics to unnecessary programs like music and art!

At -9, the Flames must be worried about his defense to.

Stevie Wonder isn’t blind

Listen, the very notion that they’re genuinely “doing” anything is flattering to them. If they were serious about some sort of insurrection against government, they could—would—have picked virtually any other building in North America to start it. They don’t want a fight. They want to get interviewed on Fox News.

[Gerald Green’s house]

Philadelphia destroys everything beautiful.

I don’t trust Alex Mack’s denial, something tells me this guy has a secret world.

this....this is a better synopsis of why we suck than anything you could have written drew. nothing against you, but this lady takes the cake.

This isn’t the best way to tell your husband that it’s not his kid.