Given their druthers, The Trump administration will turn this country back to 1609, so we might be hearing this irl in the not too distant future.

Pretty much. His boner liked how she spoke into the microphone, and he felt the need to inform us all about it. Because that’s what’s most important about any woman, clearly.

That man has an astoundingly punchable face

That is a goddamn novel, and the reason that it’s unsuccessful is that no one is reading it because they’re bored after the first paragraph.

It’s crazy how fast Cutch went from perennial MVP candidate and elite center fielder to a guy the Pirates tried to trade (and even more telling, couldn’t find a taker for) and had to move to right field because he’s supposedly too slow for center now.

Love that this “accidentally single handedly started an HIV outbreak” motherfucker is the face of responsible conservatism.

Russell Westbrook: “I don’t give a fuck about the line.”

In the last 24 hours, the Celtics went down 0-2 to a laughable Bulls team, Aaron Hernandez committed suicide, and Gronk yukked it up with a propaganda minister nobody respects.

The evening before his hanging, Hernandez was heard shouting “WHERE’S WALLACE?” in the visitors’ area.

LOL Bubbles always called him McNutty

Is McNutty a character from a porn parody of The Wire? Sheeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiit.

His lawyer is even trying to get him off on this one too!

Get McNutty on it ASAP!

Wow, this guy just can’t stop killing people. 

OTOH, TNT Commentator Shaquille O’Neal eloquently expressed what many fans were feeling over Thomas’ loss he said “Mrrump grmmhrm huunpmhrs drmmmhuhnnp urhmp.”

I’m 8 months pregnant. With a 1st grader in school this very moment. I did the same thing. So heartbreaking.

Thank you for the dark humor, because it made me stop worrying for a second about my elementary school kiddo.

Because as a country we looked at what happened at Sandy Hook and decided we were ok with it.

Fucking 2nd amendment. I’ll never know why the founding fathers thought arming bears was such a good idea.

I assume the other party in the murder suicide was a grizzly bear.