#nofuckingpolyester

Canada has a lot of “Stop Harper” signs you can borrow now that we’re done with them.

My dad used to joke when I had braces that all I needed in addition to those railroad tracks were glasses and then I would never find a husband.

Okay, the standard pockets definitely sold me. Nothing brings me more irrational joy than a dress with pockets!

Women’s clothing seems to be one of the only retail industries where they treat customers with money to spend like total shit and it’s considered acceptable. I’m not plus size but I have short legs with muscular calves. When I went to buy tall boots this year the salesman said loudly “we have NOTHING that will fit YOU…

Forget you and your anti-Southern idioms. Its only strange to YOU people, you fancy, gel-in-hair Northern types who don’t understand when you offer a Coke, its an offer for any soft drink. If you ORDER a Coke, you get a Coke. People calling it “pop” suck far worse than us simpletons who call it Coke. Not to mention we…

I once met a woman who had a baby at age 10.

And then there are people like me whose ideal indoor temp is 65-68. Staying with friends is a torture situation for me because everyone seems to keep their homes in the 72-75 range and I feel like I’m suffocating. My office could not possibly get cold enough for me to complain about it.

I kept scrolling and it wouldn’t stop. Thought maybe I was dead and in purgatory.

They decided they wanted a white man to help a black woman over the wall to take down the flag as a symbol of race relations and fighting against oppression and how allies should behave, assisting but not silencing black voices.

Yesssss. My own personal motto is “Life’s too short to wear boring clothes.” - I had a ton of “too fancy” that never got worn, and it was making me sad. Now I wear whatever I want all the damn time. Prom dress on Tuesday? Done. Cocktail gown on Friday? Sure thing. Fancy adorable dresses every day of the week? Fuck…

FINALLY ITS MY MOMENT!

See, that was the thing. It was just supposed to be one last job. Just one. Enough to hit that big final score and then retire to sunny beaches where the cute girls brought you fruity drinks with too many umbrellas sticking out of them.

For no good reason, here’s this:

Great list, thanks!

This is the best comment on Jezebel EVER.

This. Is. Amazing. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! :)

Modcloth is probably frantically copying this one as we speak

I was trying to explain this to a jeans and hoodie lover who was complaining about having to dress up for something. “Leggings and a dress made of a breathable fabric feels like wearing your pajamas but looks like you care.”