Women say practical things like “but we have stalls in and I don’t care what goes on in the next one, as long as they don’t pee on the seat.”

Vietnam: (sympathizes with Blue Jays)

Silver doubled down on the threat by naming an alternate venue, an out-of-state arena he co-owns with a guy named Steve.

He was great at so many things but I’ve always thought of him as one of the greatest guitar players of all time. It has always struck me as odd that he was never on any of the lists.

I’d criticize school staff for not seeing through the ruse, but in all fairness, nobody’s ever met a 30-year-old from South Sudan.

Fuck you, Deadspin. Greg Oden deserves a 4th (5th?) shot.

I'm thinking they were worried he would hold out and they'd be in this same position next offseason.

I don't see how he can say he's "doing fine" he's wearing an adjustable hat backwards.

Thats good because the Eagles are just one player away from the SuperBowl

For once the Browns won’t even have to draft a quarterback to guarantee themselves a bunch of picks.

Racist

Watched the whole thing, wondering who might be in the depths of hell, and found out it was none of the people I was expecting.

Donald Trump: They’re bringing drugs, they’re bringing crime, they’re rapists.

The TV stations probably just picked up Adam Wainwright muttering “not a leader” under his breath the whole game.

Nice of him to at least use a self-portrait.

It’s not a European thing. It’s an “I have no fucking clue how grown ups do things” thing.

I tended bar at a wedding where some guy tipped me ridiculously to pour him vodka and coke and also assure him that it wasn’t that weird.

IT’S A SUPER COCKTAIL!!1!?

This is as much a comment as a vodka Diet Coke is a cocktail.

I think it’ll be fun to fuck with people on the internet by prefacing everything with “Millennials won’t remember but...” and just make shit up.