this is just to tide us over until they finish drafting that multi-part series exploring the Count Duckula mythos

wait, what does this have to do with food???

First: The uncertain, unsettled condition of this science of Cetology
is in the very vestibule attested by the fact, that in some quarters it
still remains a moot point whether a whale be a fish. In his System of
Nature, A.D. 1776, Linnaeus declares, “I hereby separate the whales from
the fish.” But of my own…

"at paragraph-length, with only faintly reduced wit,"

HATENOSH:
Twitter superstar The Fat Jew on why Hydrox make him retch.

we all should have seen this coming after that comic about Mayor McCheese

surely not in P, though?

"the CW’s gritty-for-some-reason Riverdale series."

I already am eating the eggs all the time. The name of these eggs is ideology.

The maker of The Evil Dead?!

that's not what 8-bit games looked like, Internet.

Totally. The last season was a huge let-down because it began with a lot of promise — after the time skip, almost every relationship had been compromised in some way.
There was actual conflict between characters again! Especially between Ron and Leslie which makes total sense given their beliefs and personalities!

did you type that word with a sense of affronted pride?

I sind keeping busy is the best way to deasen these thoughts.

"Nothing. Doug is a fictional character."

I would, if it were a competent pastiche.
Alas!

"Vampire in Brooklyn," hello?!
Forgive me: "Master of Horror Wes Craven Presents Eddie Murphy in Vampire in Brooklyn."

http://31.media.tumblr.com/…

I would ritually sacrifice Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson without a
moment's hesitation if it would recall Mr. Wizard from the dead.

Man has underdeveloped reading of pop culture phenomena, expressed unseriously.