EVERYONE STOP TALKING ABOUT GAME OF THRONES

just got home from a long night at work and then spent like three hours watching this terrific fucking episode and drinking box wine that skewed my viewing:comedic riffing ratio to unsustainable levels. Rather than making a real post, then, I am therefore just going to paste my texts in order of thematic relevance. In…

If you look carefully on the side there's a big message written by the Night King that reads "HI EVERYONE THIS IS THE NIGHT KING AND BOY WHAT A LONG STRANGE TRIP IT'S BEEN GUESS I SHOULD START FROM THE BEGINNING HUH" and just continues for 700 miles

In this episode we learned Bran is Francis Dolarhyde, which is a pretty big twist

I just got home from a long night at work and then spent like three hours watching this terrific fucking episode and drinking box wine that skewed my viewing:comedic riffing ratio to unsustainable levels. Rather than making a real post, then, I am therefore just going to paste my texts in order of thematic relevance.…

What if Gotham follows the New York model and turns into a gentrified nightmare of insufferably self-conscious assholes endlessly monologuing about how "real" they are and talking about how they paid $13 for an authentic greasy ramen burger—just like a normal human would, but better, obviously—after waiting in line…

Sometimes I wonder if the rest of the Internet is just trying to catch up with Seanbaby in 2001.

"I am a great soft jelly thing. Smoothly rounded, with no mouth, with pulsing white holes filled by fog where my eyes used to be. Rubbery appendages that were once my arms; bulks rounding down into legless humps of soft slippery matter. I leave a moist trail when I move. Blotches of diseased, evil gray come and go on…

"Priebus and Kelly were both on Air Force One when Trump tweeted out the news."

Awesome comment! Great job!

I'll just go and stare at pictures of 9/11 instead, thank you.

Oh my god I love their insane street fighter II logic that the solution to every problem, no matter the circumstances, is to HIT BACK even if HITTING BACK is impossible/counterproductive/self-defeating/laughably impotent/insane/confusing/unconvincing/self-incriminating.

You really can't decouple politics in real life from politics as seen in movies because, in this administration, one is predicated on the other. This is Leonardo DiCaprio in Catch Me If You Can learning how to be a lawyer by marathoning Perry Mason reruns.

*Trump is interviewing Scaramucci for the job, realizes the entire time that he had been fabricating his story when he realizes Scaramucci had been drawing inspiration from the VHS copy of Turner and Hooch sitting on Trump's desk*

In third person. In front of cameras. Operated by adults. Accompanied by a loud, defeated sigh.

Never underestimate the power of Republicans to…actually, you know what? Feel free to underestimate them.

That might be the funniest part of Planet Trump's collective psyche: pampered rich white people repeatedly trying to apply things they saw on House of Cards in the real world.

One foolproof sign of a successful Presidency is when half the reality TV stars you assigned to unbelievably complicated jobs are openly asking "Am I qualified for this?"

Not gonna lie: The Mooch is probably my favorite character. It's like every aspect of his being was mathematically calibrated to perfectly replicate a generic character in a late-80's college sex comedy. Koogler is not as Koogler as The Mooch.

You are rapidly persuading me to watch whatever show this is