This comment is absolutely bizarre, and WAY creepier than the comment you responded to.

Can we PLEASE start calling him Bobby Bortles

This is great and deserves more love than it’s getting

And of course, not JUST lose, but lose in the most absolute back/heart-breaking way imaginable (i.e. taking a 5 point lead on a TD drive that only leaves 1 second on the clock, kicking off, and having THAT returned for a TD with no time left. That’d do it.)

Slammin’ High Life take bro!

Coors Banquet is also solid cheap domestic. Especially if you live around the Denver area, that shit is just fresher than if you’re somewhere else.

Yeah IPAs are acid-reflux hell for me. I wish I could have had the opportunity to like them, but I’ve almost had to go to the hospital after drinking half of one before.

Miller High Life is good beer! The clear bottle gives me a placebo effect that I am drinking a refreshing, smooth brew and that I look cool doing so.

It’s remarkable that it’s not even really up for debate that Triplette is the worst referee in NFL history.

+1 horrific rectal wound

Is there a way to block this story from my browser? I understand it’s supposed to be funny/ironic/satire, but the headline is an abrasive, annoying finger in my face every time I go to Deadspin

See, I had read that Alex Guerrero had opened up a TB12 branch in Brentwood.

Newsflash: you’re a humorless twat who is probably overpaid at $18 an hour. I bet your coworkers can’t fucking stand your endless hot taeks

There’s no way that this incident didn’t stem from an argument over Guns & Roses’ place in the rock pantheon.

You mean the defense that allowed almost 50 points, or some other defense?

I’ll have to admit to being ignorant of any Greg Howard situation and Deadspin’s involvement in it. I did a quick search but didn’t turn up anything - can you educate me on that?

Wyatt’s Instagram account is filled with dudes so disoriented by the shirts that they’ve forgotten how to look like models and instead look like overgrown 8th grade boys hanging back at the school dance

“I got a rat problem, and I don’t mean the band”

The Papa Johns guy is the only person who somehow managed to handle the NFL anthem protests worse than Roger Goodell.