I refuse to read that chain and I don’t post on Twitter, but has anybody pointed out that similar to his examples, whatever he’s paid by ESPN is definitely many times too much?

If I want to know what a choke looks like ill damn well ask a member of the Browns organization.

Endorsements help educate consumers, and sham endorsements short circuit that process. For example, I was once a State Farm customer, because family is important to me and it came through how important family was to the Paul twins (Chris and Cliff). But I switched to Nationwide because I value creativity, and the…

So folks are only respectful to you when they’re running a grift? That’s just sad, boss.

Those vacuums’ll take your dick right off. You don’t wanna have sex with them.

A reminder that the Broncos were rather recently Super Bowl champs with a stacked roster and one of the best defenses in the history of the sport. All they needed was a half-decent quarterback, Kaepernick wanted to go there, and Elway was willing to have him. But Elway insisted the Niners pay most of his salary…

I’ve seen this somewhere.

Yeah but Watson just has the natural born ability to read a defense. That’s god-given.

he’ll be back next year after changing his name to Metta World War. 

Pee Wee’s Big, Loud, “HEARD ANY GOOD JOKES LATELY!?” at the MTV Movie awards should be lesson one in how a white man gets scandaled and comes back with humility and humor rather than becoming a humorless aggrieved prick.

I couldn’t sleep on the night he was elected. It was one of the worst night’s sleeps I’ve ever gotten. I wouldn’t have felt that way about, say, Cruz or Rubio, despite how disgusting they are. Trump’s election spoke in a singular manner on how broken and fucked up our country and its political systems are. It’s deeply…

Reading this, I felt not schadenfreude, not anger, but... sadness. Not for Trump, of course—no, fuck him and his minions with a hydraulic press, and then fire the pulpy leftovers into the sun—but for the country. There are so many profoundly stupid people in this country who have blindly followed him up to now and…

My brother-in-law loved Ken Griffey Jr. as a kid and ended up being a Mariners fan despite living entirely on the opposite side of the country.

I’m sorry, but you’re a fucking idiot if you think support for impeachment went up just because he’s being impeached, instead of, you know, because he did the new thing he’s being impeached for.

Today in “Mandatory Retirement Ages in Politics.”

The New Yorker’s been a pleasure with the daily cartoon on this whole impeachment matter so far, and today’s cartoon seemed funny this morning before I started reading headlines. But now it seems downright... “hinged,” that’s the only word I can come with... hinged compared to how the GOP and especially Trump are…

He’s gonna live-tweet his own heart attack and it is, quite frankly, going to own.

Actually Ramsey didn’t. The Lyin’ media would have you think he did, but actually he did not! In fact, lots of people, and I know smart people. Tough people too. Some of the tou-some of the smartest people I know. Smart people, tough as nails. You don’t jus-You don’t just want a tough guy you know? They gotta be smart…

I thought “hacked” meant someone got wasted and drunkenly posted on the internet, blaming everything on this alleged hacker the next morning.

There was no objective asking me to replace the package in front of one house with the letter sent to the other house, inconveniencing these neighbors for a brief period long after I go home. But I don’t need to be told how to do my job. 9/10