Pro tip, everyone: Don’t fry in olive oil because it has too low a smoke point. Use peanut or canola oil to fry so you don’t stink up your apartment and set off the smoke detector.

Also, it’ll get into your pillowcase anyway, causing breakouts down the road, in addition to the sludge from your day that you aren’t rinsing off of your skin. So no, definitely don’t sleep in it.

No, you’re not crotchety. I’m only 35, and every time I hear about a goddamn “promposal”, I gnash my teeth and roll my eyes​ with a cynical WTF. They even roped Bell and Kimmel into this shit.

I’m a social worker and weekly I lead a teens only therapy group at work. A few of the kids are goth and before group one day, I walked in on them congratulating each other on their scars from cutting. Apparently, it’s a badge of honor for some of them. I had no idea. So there I was stuck between asking them not to do…

And if their lazy, uneducated asses bothered reading many of the declarations of secession, they would see that the states were seceding because the North wouldn’t let the expand slavery to the West/they were worried about the abolitionist movements taking hold and eventually causing slavery to be addressed on a…

It’s too bad they can’t read because every single one of the Confederate States’ Declarations of Causes for Secession state “slavery” not only as one of the biggest reasons for secession, but THE biggest reason for secession. To whit:

...and that’s why Germany has made Holocaust denial illegal. Some people regard it as a dangerous restriction of free speech, but it’s not. You’re allowed to say “Hitler was right” and similar, because that’s opinion; but Holocaust denial is a lie. The Holocaust is historical fact; it happened. Every historian…

It’s so weird. But I think the behavior began before presidency (see: the few hours he spent in Slovenia to meet his in-laws). People keep pointing to dementia as the reason he cannot function out of his comfort zone but I think it may be the effect of wealth ensuring his perennial personal comfort. And now he cannot…

I suppose that, when you start to decline, you feel safer in spaces that you know well.

That’s how it works now. Trump goes off to one of his properties, dragging a huge staff along with him, and the government has to pay for their room and board. He gets the profit. It is rather an ingenious con, and one of the reasons someone should take a closer look at the Emoluments Clause.

Remember the time he flew to Slovenia to meet his fiancée’s parents? And stayed for, oh, a few hours....

If Trump doesn’t do drugs, then what are amphetamines?

That’s not how any of this works....

They eat. At a certain age, that’s plenty messy in itself. Hell my niece is 5 and we still make her change out of nice clothes before eating something that’s likely to stain.

Even target is too pricey for my blood. (35$ for an itty bitty sweater? Cmon)

“For the past few years Kanye and I have made almost all of our kids clothes”

Wobbly and sinister? I knows it’s supposed to be little children figures making the letters but it looks awful.

As the former nanny to the precious progeny of a Vogue stylist, I can attest that such kiddos do fingerpaint, but the nanny job description includes handwashing their delicate garb, making many dry-cleaning runs, and just a whole hell of a lot of hovering with a variety of of wipes hand rags in hand.

There’s something very creepy about making lingerie-esque silk slip dresses for toddlers.