If Ken Jennings wanted to be the new host, there’s no way he wouldn’t get the job

Did you notice a sign on the front of my house that says “Dead Spoonhead Storage?”

Oops, wrong post

Jezebel has always been at war with Eastasia the Cuomos

Doing this did wonders for the Star Trek feature films.

In vino, veritas

Having worked retail before, there might not be a high enough dollar amount to convince me to go back

for the ‘gram, as always

Mmmm, depends on how you define “temporary”

I figure if he really wanted it, they would have hired him instead

It also kinda makes the producers look like dicks if they snap their fingers and transition immediately to the new host, like they were just waiting around for Alex to croak

PLEASE DO NOT THROW CHAIRS INTO THE RING

because just like at the baseball/football/whatever stadium, when a captive audience gotta have that drink now, they’ll pay all of the money dollars for it

here’s a look at the air traffic earlier this evening

It is surprising that Disney decided to be so antagonistic right out of the gate.

Just borrow her lawsuit, Ctrl+F any instances of “Scarlett Johansson”, and replace them with “Gerard Butler”, nobody will notice!

Ask your doctor if Touareg is right for you