Also, people call them “malteds”?

To my knowledge, McDonalds does not offer a “chocolate malted” shake. Does he call milkshakes “malteds”? The fuck is that about?

“that there” is perfectly acceptable grammar.

I approve this story, especially the part about telling children to run out into a busy street to do the manual labor while adults supervise.

Dear Jezebel writers, just so you know, I will click on each and every Meghan/Harry article you post. thank you.

I pray, more than anything, that is a children’s toy blasted into the past and the villagers are treating it like a god because it “speaks”.

It is wonderful, but Moore’s tweets still make me boil with rage.

Yeah, this is a hill I’ll die on each and every time, though Jezebel readers tend to snark hard on bad grammar and punctuation: looking down on someone for poor written or verbal communication is classist and ableist and unkind. Good communication skills are not a solid indicator of intelligence or worth. Come at me,…

Based on Jane’s reasoning, many of the writers for this site (and other GM sites) are children.

I can’t believe Jane’s rude, snarky response to the 2nd person. “You are a child”? Like, what the fuck even? I’m 35 and sometimes I write quick emails with typos, because who the fuck cares? That doesn’t mean I’m a child. Why is Jane still writing an advice column for Jezebel?

Hypothetical:

GOD FIRST MEGHAN MARKLE/PRINCE HARRY, AND NOW THIS — ALL MY FANFICTION IS COMING TRUE!!!

I’m all for it.

I feel like we need a daily post about the joys in this world to distract us all from the constant raging dumpster fire of reality.

The sheriff’s report said that no human remains were found near the vehicle, however, as the only bones they found close to it were those of a deer.

...as the only bones they found close to it were those of a deer.

I heard he spent yesterday driving to his 16 year old son’s prep school to be with him when the story broke and my immediate read of this line was that he was apologizing not to his actual victims, but to his son for embarrassing and hurting him.

I stopped watching Today after they fired Curry. They treated her like shit.

I know it seems like a thousand years ago, but remember when Matt Lauer let Trump lie and lie at that “Commander in Chief” bullshit forum on the Intrepid?

Reenactment of Curry “processing” the Lauer firing: