Why would Chtulhu need a bride?

Oh, Comey can’t comment on an open investigation?

I hope that his first thought waking up and has last thought at night are the same: “I helped create this monster.” I hope he realizes just how much he helped fuck this country, and I hope that whatever payoff he got for it will never be enough.

The story isn’t Trump’s ridiculous tweets that treat yet another bonkers conspiracy theory site story as fact. The real story is whatever Trump is trying to distract us from with them. And I’m super nervous to find out what what is.

But do they pay $50 a day to pretend a cold pressed juice diet isn’t just an eating disorder?

Soul on Ice Cycle.

If we find out Mary Poppins has been a secret SSR agent all along...I would watch the hell out of that.

I’d like to note the character in the above gif was a Russian spy, so I feel like this gif is super appropriate. 

“Yeah, but have you considered that he sounded nice, and he publicly thanked a war widow used the widow of a soldier whose blood is on his hands to score political points and distract from the speech’s terrifying message? 

Ah, the hypocrisy is thick. Remember when he went after the Khan family and accused HRC of using them as a political prop? Fun times, man. Fun times.

Yeah, and rightly so at the time, but looking to those people to answer the questions of our time is pretty dumb. I’ll take morality lessons from the stories but that’s where the line should be drawn.

We’ve found Sodom. Fucking meteor hit it. Imagine being a shepherd on the outskirts of town - that would’ve had ‘God is PISSED’ written all over it

I think it’s probably a variation of that second one. “God will know, and if you don’t want to burn for all eternity you’ll confess.”

I see a lot of parallels between organized religion and its usual foe - pornography. Neither institution is bad in and of itself, and plenty of people emerge from both organized religion and the porn business having had great experiences. But both tend to attract very vulnerable people, and the capacity and…

Hey! I take offense to this! Us Friends of Cthulhu would never dream of harming another living soul. We just wait and plot for the cessation of our Lord’s slumber deep in the sunken, craggy city of Ry’leh and the ensuing madness and destruction such an awakening will release.

CHRISTIANITY IS A VIOLENT WAY OF LIFE. IT IS NOT A RELIGION. DO NOT LET THIS DANGEROUS CULT TAKE OVER YOUR COUNTRY.

Just repeating some things some of the bigots in my town were saying re: Islam this week. Now I expect an apology from all Christians on behalf of these monsters. You’ll have to be really loud about it…

So because a small sub-sect of Christianity is batshit crazy bullshit assholes we should ban the entire religion. That’s how this works, right?

You know, you just never hear about this kind of crap with atheists. Yeah, some atheists are assholes - but they don’t, as an organization, advocate BEATING CHILDREN.

Right? That’s the bar now for the highest office in our country - coherent thoughts and complete sentences!

Trump makes GWB look like a saint. That’s not a small feat.