Is it safe to assume we collectively opened the wrong envelope in November?

What the fuck is catsup? Is it another name for a cat’s dinner?

Now I miss Pinkham and Behind Closed Ovens.

It’s almost as if he has no class or refinement. Like a short fingered vulgarian.

Having spent 7 years working in a steakhouse, I can attest that there are exactly two kinds of adults who eat steak like this:

I’m here for Lin-Manuel Miranda’s EGOT and for the fantasy of La-La Land to go fuck itself.

She’s the Spicer that Spicer could only ever dream of being. The platonic ideal of Sean Spicer. And she mastered that in her spare time, for fun.

Come on. You know he doesn’t have the strength or stamina to be on top during sex.

He would still watch it on TV, what balls deep in Ivanka, then die (smothering her) while it is playing in the background.

HOW AMAZING WOULD IT BE IF THEY ROASTED HILLARY AND GENERALLY ACTED AS THOUGH SHE WERE THE SITTING PRESIDENT, a la HILLARYBEATTRUMP.ORG

By...picking a DNC chair that’s near-identical to another DNC candidate? JFC this division is getting rediculous. “My guy says he’ll raise min wage by $10, and the other guy will only raise it by $9.50! CORRUPT RIGGED BERN IT TO THE GROUND!” Jeezy creezy.

Gotta love spite  white voters.

but that is at least two less dramatic revelations that Barry has to hide from his friends at STAR labs for... reasons!

We need better sex education, demystify feminine products and the menstrual cycle and birth control beyond condoms for future generations of humanity.

Yes. this confused me. I thought he would avail himself of his second amendment blankie for protection when he felt threatened. Isn’t that what he suggested would fix the fear? Grab your blankie and go forth, Louie!

I’m a proud Giffords voter and these cowardly Republicans can fuck right off.

work that money, amber! <3

I never heard of him until this article. I am so out of touch.

These are kids, for crying out loud. KIDS. He, as a fucking police officer who has had significant training for these types of situations, should know how to handle it without having to pull out his gun and shoot it. It was not the child’s responsibility to de-escalate shit.