I hate everybody.

She was returning to TJ Maxx not the brand’s store. It’s isn’t too surprising that a TJ Maxx employee isn’t an expert on all bags.

I bought a few bags from her and couldn’t be happier. My wife loves her Louie Voltron bag.

Definitely giving her too much credit. Worse still is that she gets the millions and accolades for these terrible movies, so there’s zero reason for her to stop accepting substanceless/shitty flicks. She got an oscar nom for that mop movie. Wouldn’t be surprised if she gets awards for this too.

But if you’re still jonesing for Resting JLaw Acting Face, create your own homebrew version by standing in front of a mirror and trying to remember the last eleven places you put your car keys.

Wait also, why does the ship have all these fancy amenities if the passengers are in hibernation the entire time? Do they have bartenders and restaurants and entertainment just in the off-chance an idiot wakes up too soon? Wouldn’t the passengers just wake up when they get to the planet? Jesus, the mystery of this…

He tries to shoot himself in the head, but misses and damages her pod.

I like how much credit you give her. she is kind of a douche and has a gazillion dollars yet keeps making shitty high-profile movies that pay her another gazillion dollars. I’m sure that after reading the horrible script her only comment was “I’ll do it for 20 million”.

They lost me at “Aurora.” You just know that whichever draft that first appeared in, the following script doctor’s immediate reaction was, “Too obvious” only to be countered by some studio lackey chirping, “Sleeping beauty — brilliant!”

Yeah, thats just creepy af.

Thank you for your service and for saving me fifteen bucks.

My morning conspiracy is that Mariah retouched herself but left Beyoncé alone. I do not believe the left side of that photo in comparison to the right.

I have put three dogs to sleep in the past twenty years, with three different vets. I was holding them each time. First they got a sedative that made them very relaxed and sleepy, and then an injection of I believe potassium chloride that stops the heart in several minutes. I was a wreck, but it was very peaceful and…

I don’t have kids so I might be off base. But I have 2 nieces (well 3, but one is a one year old so they’re not super aware yet) and I’ve been trying to get them experiences rather than material things. They have toys and games and clothes already, so this year I’m taking them to Disney on ice. Last year it was a trip…

This is our first Xmas with baby, so we’ll see how far we get but right now our intention is to buy her “something she wants, something she needs, something she wears, something she reads”. Like I said long term who knows if this is realistic but here’s hoping. Since she’s 8 months old for her “want” I’m honestly…

is a writer and graduate student in Montreal.

No kids, but I always wondered if I could get my future kids super hyped about traveling/experiences so that for Christmas I could essentially gift them our summer vacation or some other trip that isn’t typically considered a “gift”. SANTA GOT YOU A TRIP TO CHILE AND A WINDBREAKER, WHICH YOU WILL NEED FOR SAID TRIP TO…

I didn’t realize your 3 and 5 year old were personally responsible for the state of the world but if you really feel like ruining their Christmas instead of doing anything proactive like, oh, I don’t know, contacting your senator or volunteering with an organization that’s actively affected by the state of things,…

I don’t think any of them would be comfortable on a farm in the Midwest. His sons might, if they had the opportunity to kill some penned animals (what they call canned hunting and what I call “cowardly assholes engaging in target shooting”). But Trump was appalled that he would have to live in DC, as if the White…

dressed for a funeral.