Consumer tip: Don't buy Milk Bone brand air conditioner cables.

You know what? Even after the fuckups and the lies what amazes me is the fact that this fucking idiot couldn't even get it together enough to bury the dogs and hide the fucking evidence. How fucking stupid do you have to be?

haha by "worst part" I mean "thing that mildly annoys me every once in awhile"

necromantic articles are good for the undead soul :D

Ha, it always looks like that.

OK, I guess I'll just come right out and explain the joke, since you're pretending to have the reading comprehension and critical reasoning faculties of a fish stick.

Um... the article says she is a medical assistant? That's scary.

But in the comments at the original site someone blames common core? Isn't that correct? It just makes SO MUCH sense.....

Shit, the opening scene of Die Hard shows gas under $1/gal. $2 gas would be some really really young parents.

"Excuse me, officer. I lost one, it looks like this." *points to one of the remaining unlost children*

Wow, that girl looks like all of my OKCupid matches.

Slender Man?

Also, this is STILL BETTER than birth control and comprehensive sex education, social safety nets and publicly-funded mental health programs.

Are you sure that you weren't actually working at Target and your mom just said it was traveling/vacation?

Another win for Florida

Andrew Jackson: "Hey, Indians... GTFO."

Challenger: [explodes]

I'm from Jalopnik and I thought this was going to be about valves. :(