Why, it’s almost as if, somehow, a pitcher’s record isn’t as good an indicator of value as some more applicable sabermet—

Not to mention he walked right past all those penny-looking objects in the lemon’s path. We get it Mike, we’re peasants. Don’t be such a dick.

Not to mention the side story of Son, coming off a couple of pretty decent seasons for Tottenham (easy everybody, not all at once), getting the breakaway dunk, only to be denied when trying to execute one of those endearing, goofball-custom handshakes he likes, on account of the SK squad laying on his head.

How some athletes/coaches/managers still don’t understand the role of journalism is beyond me. If you want to be covered by a group of folks with a long history of pushing relative fluff while actively caping for a particular team, regardless of accuracy, you’ve got an uphill climb ahead of you, bucko.

Counterpoint: waiting out the rain, in your cart, at a golf course.

“now step aside or I’ll impale you on my eyebrow(s)”

All these witty observations and NOBODY wants to talk about the dork shouting what sounds like “Doobie! Doobie!” in video 2?

Your honor, the defense would like to call its first witness...

Yeah, that damn Kurt Cousins. Always acting like he’s as “good” a player as his long-lost brother Kirk, but looking more awkward than his step-brother DeMorcus at a limbo contest.

Great, now I’m going to spend all day fighting to keep from telling coworkers to “Stop exploding you cowards!” in my best Billy West. Thanks a lot.

Steeeeeeve Perry

Correct. Between Capela, Gordon (?), Harden (?!?!) and co last night, the Warriors’ own mistakes were forced not-inconsequentially by some quality defense, and were then promptly exploited by the robo-offense. Even if you factor in the fatigue and injuries common with postseason play, you still can’t ignore how…

Sounds right to me. I, for one, am also curious as to what excuse will be made if NFL ratings continue to trend downwards this season. After all, one of the biggest complaints from customers last year was that no-talent thug disrespeckin’ muh land and flag, bah gawd.

If you’re into college football, the ESPN app usually carries “SkyCam” (or ‘Madden view’, for you dang youths) for the big matchups, which I argue is the ideal way to consume sports. Long, continuous shots from a single camera, no replays, no dumb graphics or PiPs, no announcers, stadium sounds only. It’s as if you’re…

Your commitment to the persona is commendable.

Especially with a butt-swing on a junk ball. Seriously, what is your retort if you’re Baez? “Yeah, you DID get me to fan on that one. AND I looked ridiculous. AND you celebrated. So... take it back, jerk!”

Burning T = “Time to Leave”

I personally have to wonder whether she’s helping team USA or usa move on, not to mention whether she can be trusted or TRUSTed...

2024 US Lead Climb Championships - “And that’s another new US record for Honnold! I don’t know WHO will beat the blistering pace he just set during his redpoint up the Coke Zero (TM) Headless Rushmore Gravel Pile and Oil Treatment Facility, graciously provided by Exxon, Menards, and Viagra. When the pressure’s on and…

And then Boban took everyone surfing: