The decision to vacate the wins was nearly two and a half years old, so it comes as no surprise that Penn State completely fucked it.

Will you should write a guide about how to buy beer for parties. Beer enthusiasts buying for a non-enthusiast crowd and vice versa.

I have several pairs of the Head Digital gloves and I love them all. They work great with my phone, my iPod, and my GPS. Plus, they're super warm without the bulk of other gloves.

I have several pairs of the Head Digital gloves and I love them all. They work great with my phone, my iPod, and my…

Even more reason to support unionization. Unions are delicious.

No. Think smaller, with more legs.

The McRib is made from workers who tried to unionize!

Whether you watched football or the Golden Globes yesterday, you were likely exposed to a new McDonald's ad

Yeah, that Applebee's menu will be a collector's item.

READ BETWEEN THE LINES, SHEEPLE

-Occasionally you'll accidentally download porn

Shaking a little escapee out of his pants leg. He'll write in to Drew with the story after the holidays.

Okay, New Year's Futurama marathon. Done. -fires up my Complete Series DVDs-

I have to say, Office lens is really cool and I'm glad it made this list. I wish I had it back when I was actually in school and at least pretended to take notes.

"That's why you have an Assistant Recievers Coach"

Of course the Niners are stupid, Drew. It takes a special kind of stupid to let seven eat you.

I don't ask women for naked photos via direct message, I don't tell women their opinions aren't valid because they're women, I don't call athletes pussies, I don't interact like an asshole to dozens of Twitter followers, and I don't fire off ridiculous e-mails to fellow writing colleagues.

Coke is the worst. Do you call any candy bar a Snickers? A fast food burger a Big Mac? A condom a Trojan? A tissue a Kleenex... er... well... I guess that blows my argument out of the nostril.

Uh, you can't improve on Billy Joel and you really can't do it by adding Jay-Z.

I see very little proof.