If I wore a white hat, that shit would get so dirty so quick. The inside band would be gray within a couple days.

I would STILL die.

When I first watched Twin Peaks, the pilot wasn't included in the DVD box set, so I was like, "Man, this show is quirky!"

Was anyone able to tell the difference when they watched it?

I've been really busy and tired and I have this stupid guilt for having NOT played any games for a while. It's dumb as hell. Like, I just haven't had the energy and I feel like Skyrim has been totally neglected.

Man, when I was 19, me and my roommates had a ritual that I think would kill me if I did it today: We would take a rip off a gravity bong… fucking two liters of smoke… and then play GoldenEye for hours. If I did that today, I would have a panic attack and die.

Leave it to tons of people on the internet to be wrong about something very easy to get right.

According to the worst people on the internet, it's a publicity stunt!

I just wanted to see how many alt-right slogans he could throw at me. I'm apparently triggered. I wanted to go for the holy trifecta of being a triggered-cuck-snowflake.

Thanks for thinking I'm tough! Your mom certainly thought so.

What the fuck does Hillary Clinton have to do with any of this?

To be clear, I don't give a fuck what you think.

"I've seen Death Wish like twenty times! I am so tough!"

What a fucking *COWARD* this goddamn guy is.

I saw "Red Dawn"! I'm good!

Because they have guns! And the guns make them feel like they're patriots because it says right there! It says owning guns makes you able to overthrow the government!

I HATE the government! Except all of the military, which is ironically socialized and eats up all the money from the taxes I pay and bitch about constantly.

One of my dipshit "friends" from high school on Facebook put some, "Mmm, how sexy" thing about a gun on his wall the day a bunch of people were massacred in America (so, like, Tuesday) and I was like, "Why is your sex god so awful?!"

I saw it when it was brand new on video when I was 11 or 12 or so, and I was thinking, "Ugh, this sounds so boring!" But somehow Scorsese made a most engaging movie that happened to be a biopic of the Dali Lama.

I really, really hope you're right.